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  #11251  
Old 11-06-2009, 05:03 PM
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Worse than ruined? PARADOX

Your mom is worse than ruined.
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  #11252  
Old 11-06-2009, 05:22 PM
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We would have also accepted, "your mom is a paradox."
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  #11253  
Old 11-06-2009, 10:05 PM
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we would also accept your mom
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DT, you are lucky you don't live in Michigan because I would lay it on you hardcore. Just sayin'.
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  #11254  
Old 11-06-2009, 10:37 PM
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Your mom is accepted in more places than Visa AND American Express.
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  #11255  
Old 11-06-2009, 10:39 PM
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She also has sex with lots of men.
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Josh is pretty punk rock with his internetting.
The Quarantines - now featuring songs.
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  #11256  
Old 11-07-2009, 05:40 AM
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The apartment manager put a low-flow nozzle on my bathroom faucet. It's like some shitty rest stop bathroom.

Now I have to go to Home Depot and replace it because assholes want to water their lawns.
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  #11257  
Old 11-07-2009, 04:09 PM
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My 5 month old's weight keeps decreasing and we don't know why. So, we go back to the doc on Wednesday and if she hasn't gained what he wants, we have to run a bunch of tests. The girl eats like crazy so I'm hoping it's just a metabolic problem and not something more serious.
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  #11258  
Old 11-07-2009, 05:53 PM
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Make her do squats and deadlifts. 5x5. She'll be fine.
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Josh is pretty punk rock with his internetting.
The Quarantines - now featuring songs.
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  #11259  
Old 11-07-2009, 08:50 PM
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Best parenting advice ever. Just let her drive herself to the gym, too.
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  #11260  
Old 11-07-2009, 09:36 PM
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Feed her buckets of mayonnaise.
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  #11261  
Old 11-07-2009, 10:09 PM
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my roommate had swine flu last week, and today im feverish and achy. ugh
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  #11262  
Old 11-07-2009, 11:27 PM
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I have a pair or broken ribs. I haven't had a good nights sleep in over a week as a result.
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  #11263  
Old 11-08-2009, 01:54 AM
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Tracer, we both agreed that trying to suck your own dick was a bad idea.
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  #11264  
Old 11-08-2009, 02:01 AM
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I actually broke them at a Renaissance Faire! I'll just bet you didn't think the real reason would be gayer, did you? Surprise, surprise.
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  #11265  
Old 11-08-2009, 07:47 PM
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I have a pair or broken ribs. I haven't had a good nights sleep in over a week as a result.
That sucks!

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I actually broke them at a Renaissance Faire!.
Never mind, you deserved it.
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  #11266  
Old 11-08-2009, 09:05 PM
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I was very drunk, it was 4 am, temperature in the mid 30's and leaving one camp for my own I tripped on a tent tie line. I bit it pretty hard.
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  #11267  
Old 11-08-2009, 09:25 PM
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Sounds like karma!
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  #11268  
Old 11-09-2009, 03:04 PM
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Lol we're all such nice people
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  #11269  
Old 11-09-2009, 03:08 PM
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I woke up at around 3 am with my arm feeling completely asleep, it felt like my right arm wasn't even there, and that has me freaked out, I don't even think I was sleeping on it. Now I have thoughts of having it amputated or something
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  #11270  
Old 11-09-2009, 03:18 PM
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Work in general hasn't been very good to me. My office slashed all of our pay to minimize layoffs. I'm okay with that, since I rather take a hit on my paycheck to see my co-workers keep their jobs. However, we still saw a few people get laid off, and their case loads are now on our desks. So our pay has decreased but our work has increased. On top of that, our benefits also got reduced, so we're taking a larger hit on our already-decreased salaries.
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  #11271  
Old 11-09-2009, 03:19 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Thief Silver View Post
I woke up at around 3 am with my arm feeling completely asleep, it felt like my right arm wasn't even there, and that has me freaked out, I don't even think I was sleeping on it. Now I have thoughts of having it amputated or something
If it keeps happening you might have carpal tunnel.
If it's a one time thing you probably just slept with it in a weird position.
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  #11272  
Old 11-09-2009, 03:25 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Nash View Post
Work in general hasn't been very good to me. My office slashed all of our pay to minimize layoffs. I'm okay with that, since I rather take a hit on my paycheck to see my co-workers keep their jobs. However, we still saw a few people get laid off, and their case loads are now on our desks. So our pay has decreased but our work has increased. On top of that, our benefits also got reduced, so we're taking a larger hit on our already-decreased salaries.
That really sucks man, sorry to hear it.
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  #11273  
Old 11-09-2009, 03:29 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by FirstBlood View Post
If it keeps happening you might have carpal tunnel.
If it's a one time thing you probably just slept with it in a weird position.
This happens to me a lot, but I reckon I sleep on one of my arms weird a lot.

I didn't know there was a correlation to that kind of acute numbness and carpal tunnel syndrome.

Edit: Sorry to hear that Nash. Troubling times.
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  #11274  
Old 11-09-2009, 03:59 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Nash View Post
Work in general hasn't been very good to me. My office slashed all of our pay to minimize layoffs. I'm okay with that, since I rather take a hit on my paycheck to see my co-workers keep their jobs. However, we still saw a few people get laid off, and their case loads are now on our desks. So our pay has decreased but our work has increased. On top of that, our benefits also got reduced, so we're taking a larger hit on our already-decreased salaries.
Diarrhea waterfall, bud. Hope business picks up soon.
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Once, a gang of fat girls threatened to beat me up for not cottoning to their advances. As they explained it to me: "guys can usually beat up girls, but we are all fat, and there are a lot of us."
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I would love nothing more than to rape g0zen and Firstblood.
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  #11275  
Old 11-09-2009, 04:02 PM
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my roommate had swine flu last week, and today im feverish and achy. ugh
The rep I use at my digital printer has swine flu! lol. It's just like regular flu, except your throat is gets sore, according to people. This swine flu craze is so dumb. People waiting in line up here in November to get the vaccine who are already sick. If you have the swine flu or have had it YOU ARE ALREADY VACCINATED.

I just love the idea of people waiting out in 0 degree whether getting pneumonia (which has a far higher mortality rate) in order to avoid H1N1.
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Once, a gang of fat girls threatened to beat me up for not cottoning to their advances. As they explained it to me: "guys can usually beat up girls, but we are all fat, and there are a lot of us."
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I would love nothing more than to rape g0zen and Firstblood.
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  #11276  
Old 11-09-2009, 06:22 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Thief Silver View Post
I woke up at around 3 am with my arm feeling completely asleep, it felt like my right arm wasn't even there, and that has me freaked out, I don't even think I was sleeping on it.
Masturbate with it. Feels like getting a hand job. Oh, and see a neurologist, but don't tell him about your sick behavior.
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  #11277  
Old 11-09-2009, 08:38 PM
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I just love the idea of people waiting out in 0 degree whether getting pneumonia (which has a far higher mortality rate) in order to avoid H1N1.
How the hell can you get pneumonia right and weather wrong?
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  #11278  
Old 11-09-2009, 08:43 PM
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hacked by buttcheeks.
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Josh is pretty punk rock with his internetting.
The Quarantines - now featuring songs.
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  #11279  
Old 11-10-2009, 12:40 AM
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I don't think it's carpal tunnel since it's my entire arm not just my hand, if it were just my hand I would be worried about that.

If it happens again and I'm sure I wasn't sleeping weird I probably will, it just really freaks me out when that happens. It feels like your arm is missing.
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  #11280  
Old 11-10-2009, 01:13 PM
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I think I do actually have the starting symptons of CTS.
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  #11281  
Old 11-10-2009, 03:18 PM
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When I was in university, my arm used to go numb almost every night I slept in residence.
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  #11282  
Old 11-11-2009, 12:33 PM
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LOUD ASS parade going down Madison Ave today. I'd be okay with it if I could watch it, but I can't, so fuck you veterans!
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  #11283  
Old 11-11-2009, 01:19 PM
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My eyeball. I've been having some irritation from my contacts the last few days. Suddenly this morning something is going on at the very edge of my pupil. The redness moved over to the pupil and now it's encroaching on the color so a tiny piece of my pupil looks like it's missing.

I'm overdue for an eye exam/prescription so I'm going to go get one and see if they think I need to drag my ass over to county USC. This is freaking me out a little.
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  #11284  
Old 11-11-2009, 01:27 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by cigsthecat View Post
My eyeball. I've been having some irritation from my contacts the last few days. Suddenly this morning something is going on at the very edge of my pupil. The redness moved over to the pupil and now it's encroaching on the color so a tiny piece of my pupil looks like it's missing.

I'm overdue for an eye exam/prescription so I'm going to go get one and see if they think I need to drag my ass over to county USC. This is freaking me out a little.
Could be an eye infection. It happens sometimes when contact lenses aren't properly disinfected or worn too long.
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  #11285  
Old 11-11-2009, 01:50 PM
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Someone got shot at work today as I was coming in. Gotta love Orlando...
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  #11286  
Old 11-11-2009, 01:52 PM
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Could be an eye infection. It happens sometimes when contact lenses aren't properly disinfected or worn too long.
Hopefully I'll at least get a Mac Tonight eyeball out of this.
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  #11287  
Old 11-11-2009, 01:55 PM
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Conjunctivitis sucks, but it's easy to get rid of. Hopefully that's all it is.
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  #11288  
Old 11-11-2009, 11:57 PM
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When it rains, it pours. My wife just came home and told me she got laid off. What the fuck.
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  #11289  
Old 11-12-2009, 12:55 AM
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Quote:
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When it rains, it pours. My wife just came home and told me she got laid off. What the fuck.

My girlfriend got laid off about four months ago and because she had a part-time job, she got relatively nothing from unemployment. I had to pick up a bunch of slack on the bills for awhile and I've been pretty broke lately. Fortunately she just started a new job making way more than me...
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  #11290  
Old 11-12-2009, 03:16 AM
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When it rains, it pours. My wife just came home and told me she got laid off. What the fuck.
Holy shit. You must have offended some god or something.
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  #11291  
Old 11-12-2009, 02:26 PM
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Gozer?
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DT, you are lucky you don't live in Michigan because I would lay it on you hardcore. Just sayin'.
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  #11292  
Old 11-12-2009, 03:54 PM
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  #11293  
Old 11-12-2009, 04:05 PM
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DT, you are lucky you don't live in Michigan because I would lay it on you hardcore. Just sayin'.
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  #11294  
Old 11-12-2009, 05:00 PM
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FUCK. We moved my grandmother from Vegas to Cleveland to live near my family last March because my grandfather passed away from cancer. Well she went last Saturday to get a chest xray because she had a bad cough, well they found a large tumor. She went in for a cat scan today and she has metastatic lung cancer that has spread throughout her body. Fuck this disease, fuck it straight up it's god damn ass. Nothing ever prepares you for news like this, no matter how good of a grasp you think you have on things.

This reaffirms that quitting cigarettes was the best decision I ever made. Fuck those things too.
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I am pretty sure one of the reasons Jesus died is so we could enjoy delicious chicken and waffle fries seven days a week.
Eat a bag of dicks.
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  #11295  
Old 11-12-2009, 05:58 PM
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Damn dude my condolences
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Originally Posted by Dolemite
I've changed my mind about Korian. Anyone that can piss off so many people so easily is awesome. You people are suckers, playing right into his evil yellow hands.
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  #11296  
Old 11-12-2009, 09:39 PM
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Rhydant Rhydant is offline
Now seasoned with health
 
 
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: San Diego
Posts: 4,222
Rhydant is turning headsRhydant is turning heads

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Hi TNL, it's been awhile. I've been living at my mom's house for the last two weeks. I was supposed to move into a house that my friend is buying, but it hasn't closed yet. He said it should of closed in October. He is a LIAR. Anyhow. This kinda sucks. But I don't have to pay rent, so score.
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  #11297  
Old 11-12-2009, 09:48 PM
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Josh Josh is offline
Your foster parents are dead.
 
 
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: I'll be back.
Posts: 46,407
Josh is sorely missed when not aroundJosh is sorely missed when not aroundJosh is sorely missed when not aroundJosh is sorely missed when not aroundJosh is sorely missed when not aroundJosh is sorely missed when not aroundJosh is sorely missed when not aroundJosh is sorely missed when not aroundJosh is sorely missed when not around

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You're making things up. I was at your mom's house two nights ago and I didn't see you around.
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Josh is pretty punk rock with his internetting.
The Quarantines - now featuring songs.
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  #11298  
Old 11-13-2009, 05:01 AM
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Fe 26 Fe 26 is offline
Tetsujin 26!
 
 
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: MS
Posts: 22,127
Fe 26 is becoming pretty importantFe 26 is becoming pretty importantFe 26 is becoming pretty importantFe 26 is becoming pretty importantFe 26 is becoming pretty important

Wii Friend Code: what? PS3 Network ID: chicken butt
As big as it is, Rhydant can not fix into his mom's ass
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  #11299  
Old 11-13-2009, 11:58 AM
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PaCrappa PaCrappa is offline
into the night i roll...
 
 
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: outer space
Posts: 5,925
PaCrappa has some major clout around herePaCrappa has some major clout around herePaCrappa has some major clout around herePaCrappa has some major clout around herePaCrappa has some major clout around herePaCrappa has some major clout around here

I don't think I enjoy rice milk very much anymore
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  #11300  
Old 11-13-2009, 12:36 PM
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YellerDog YellerDog is offline
wants to make an indie game.
 
 
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Brighton, Mass
Posts: 22,094
YellerDog can buy and sell youYellerDog can buy and sell youYellerDog can buy and sell youYellerDog can buy and sell youYellerDog can buy and sell youYellerDog can buy and sell youYellerDog can buy and sell you

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Not after what you saw...
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2008 can fuck off, b-ri = not a homeowner, b-ri is homeless, b-ri=move out, bugging, ditch dat zero, do you still wish death?, drunk drivin' assholes, get wif a hero, im going to eat a bullet, infestations, move on, pay your insurance moron, ramon wants 2 b an hero, razor doesn't understand, razor has heart of stone, scissor me xerxes, sense of entitlement, where b-ri c-ries

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