Booth Babes Unleashed: Part One Feature - The Next Level

Booth Babes Unleashed: Part One

The dirty truth about the kiosk kittens in all of their glory.

Article by Candice Shane (Email)
May 18th 2006, 11:40PM
 

This year, there was a few hushed whispers of the E3 committee and their disapproval of the Booth Babes and this seemed to strike a chord of questioning in my heart. Why waste the oxygen on just us nerdy gamers? Why not bring a little bit of glamour and fairy dust to our usual meek and mild existence? Everyone knows that without some "sexy bitches" to look at while we're wandering the floor at Kentia Hall -- that we might forget why the hell we're there in the first place. Right? Anyone?

I'm not one of those weird feminists that thinks women shouldn't be subjected to stereotypes. I personally never got on that bandwagon because a lot of times we as women welcomed those stereotypes. We like to be thought of as pretty and we like being looked at. We're distractions from a usual bleak world and so I gathered this "Booth Babe" phenomenon as fascinating and wanted to learn as much as I possibly could about it. With a voice recorder in one hand and a smile on my exhausted face, I ventured into the belly of the Booth Babe beast.

Our first day of E3 was exhausting and I had spent most of it running from one appointment to the next and even though we didn't have many, we had lots of people to see. We had wanted to play the Wii and all of us were fascinated with at least one feature this year. This meant that we all went our seperate ways at a certain point and a tired and exhausted Candice was now standing on the floor of Kentia Hall by herself. A lone booth off to the corner represented NVidia and I noticed a few people around some PCs. I started closer and was greeted by a scantily clad female with a stack of cards in her hand and legs that went on for days. Strange. I had heard so much earlier about how these types of distractions were not allowed this year, so what was this girl doing here? I started closer and asked her for a card and she politely handed me one but gave me quite a forelorn look, as if she was just as lost as I was.

"I don't know much about what's going on. Heh. I'm kind of new here.", she blurted out as I took the card from her fingertips. I gave her a reassuring smile, but stepped over to the side so that the other people could get through. As I looked over the card, she then jutted a thumb behind her towards the people playing at the computers and ushered my attention towards their stage.

"I think it's for some game called.. Oon-ree-ahl or something. Oo.. Oooh.. ", she babbled as she tried to get out the very obviously difficult word. It didn't even come to me that she was trying to pronounce a word we all knew. Well, I shouldn't be so vague -- most people knew the word because it's in our everyday vernacular.

The word was "Unreal".

No, I'm not kidding. She really couldn't pronounce it. I even looked over her shoulder and spotted the people playing the game which immediately lead me to the conclusion that she was stumbling over "Unreal". Was NVidia even bothering to tell these girls what was going on at their booth? Was it like this everywhere else? Were there many more scantily clad women with useless jobs and even worse vocabulary skills? I shook my head and slid the card into my back pocket with the sincerest task at hand and that was to uncover the depth and meat of my gender's job market at E3.

Be they dressed up as Roman goddesses or ...chicks with cat tails, I would decipher the code of the E3 Booth Babes!


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