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So you're just a drifter, going from town to town to pick up a little coinage. Not really minding anyone's business but your own. One day you see a woman being harassed by your average psychotic thugs. So you decide to show off your martial arts prowess, and beat some manners into them. Only they beat you around like your name was Glass Joe, and then cut your goddamn arm off! You can hear them laughing as you pass out from the pain, but when you awake there's a new arm on your shoulder. The legendary god hand, full of overwhelming power. But before you can rush off to teach those punks a lesson, the woman you rescued has a few favors to ask, and that axe she's carrying won't look so friendly if you refuse.
This is Gene's life, and now it's yours.
This is the greatest beat 'em up the world has ever seen.
Right from the start the story is insane, with a giant cigar-smoking demon named Elvis as Gene's first major rival, and a female sidekick that likes pinning a "kick me" sign to the back of this reluctant savior to all humankind. There are thugs with electric mohawks, kung fu masters straight out of a Bruce Lee movie, and an amazon dominatrix with a razor edged hat to hurl in your direction. That's not even mentioning the midgets. In fact, the only thing crazier than the setting is the depth of the fighting engine.
God Hand is everything I've dreamed of in a beat 'em up since first playing Final Fight more than a decade ago, set in a bizarre world of Fist of the Northstar meets Benny Hill.
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There are a hundred and fourteen basic attacks to be learned or earned in God Hand, and that doesn't include the dozens of devastating god reel super assaults. Everything from a simple left jab, to a granny knocker that will put your enemies in a daze. Launchers, jugglers, stunners, guard breakers, slow moving bone crushers, and rapid fire fists of fury. Nearly a dozen attacks can be equipped at once, and mixed up any way you please, at any time from the pause screen. That doesn't include the two dash attacks, quick evasion sweep to catch enemies off guard, or context sensitive beat downs. These let you take advantage of a stunned thug or thugess with a barrage of fists to the gut, drop kicks that drive them into the ground, or spanking those female enemies that have been especially naughty.
If you don't move quick in this game, you're bound to get bruised. The left stick is your typical Resident Evil style tank controls, turning side to side and tapping forward twice to dash (with L1 for a quick 180). The right stick is going to get a whole lot of tapping and nudging, for it's the source of your quick evasion skills, letting you backflip and sidestep with ease. Even all this isn't going to be enough when you're up against a half dozen maniacs, cackling and wielding giant spiked bats. That's when you unleash the big gun, and by "gun" I mean your arm. Build up your meter and you can throw down with the full power of the god hand, transforming Gene into Jet Li on a good day. His attacks rain down with lightning speed while he's completely immune to retaliation. Then there's the god reel. These are a dozen overpowered single attacks that clear out a whole wave of enemies, or take a nice chunk off a boss's life bar. Of course, they're both limited use. Just like the occasional weapon or explosive barrel Gene can pick up to pack a bit more punch.
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