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I just got a call from my neighbor, and apparently she saw someone stop and stuff one of the nine or ten garbage bags we had lying out by the sidewalk into his trunk. Why would someone steal a bag of garbage? I was thinking maybe one of you would know.
Maybe he though the bag contained magical treasure.
Or perhaps he's a gay stalker, and longs to rub your used toilet paper all over his nipples.
OMG IDENTITY THEFT!!!
That's the only thing I can think of, unless your town has been invaded by people who love to collect garbage.
EDIT: Hehe. Maybe this is how those web sites do their research - the ones where you can sign up and find out anything you wanted to know about such-and-such person.
Hey, you know what the say.
One man's garbage is another man's treasure.
Now you are living proof! :D
Was he driving a DeLorean?
What the fuck, man? Don't you flush that stuff? What kind of sick degenerate monster throws their shitty toilet paper in the trash can?Quote:
Originally Posted by Dolemite
Identity theft has become the new Red Hunt (the whole Communists scare). I may not have phrased that right, but I meant it in the context of everyone thinking identity theft lurks EVERYWHERE, even under the bed and in the closet. What's bad is that identity theft IS growing and spreading. Anyone can get your info from checks, credit card statements, etc.
Hey, don't call Lucas that. He's okay.Quote:
Originally Posted by Grave
I'm pretty sure one mans trash is another mans trash too.
Heh. That crazy Doc Brown.Quote:
Originally Posted by Kenshin
But on a more serious note, maybe you have a PI on your ass.
Garbage is an excellent source when investigating someone.
Hmm...good point.
So here's what you do: Use the garbage pail for your bodily disposal rather than the toilet. That will make them think twice.
I was going to just fill them with anthrax, but yeah, I guess that would work too.
we had a problem with someone picking out magazines from our recycling, so we rolled a turd up in one of them. needless to say, she never did it again
Turd is my favorite word for "shit."
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard.Quote:
Originally Posted by arjue
Was this a human turd or an animal turd?Quote:
Originally Posted by arjue
Does it matter?Quote:
Originally Posted by OmegaFlareX
Quote:
Originally Posted by SapphirePhoenix
It's becoming the next big crime and has increased dramatically over the past 10 years. I'm a victim of Identity Theft as well. I found out last year, that I had a gas card issued in my name and had nothing to do with it. I just found out about 6 months ago, that someone opened a bank account in my name at Net Bank. About $12,000 has been sitting in the account, but it has not had any transactions for about 2 years. A paper shredder is looking like a good investment right now.
Someone stole my garbage can lid once.. I win...
I found his mom's used tampons on ebay.
I'd provide the link, but I wanna win the auction.
I hope to fuck that you withdrew the money.Quote:
Originally Posted by gamevet
Identity theft is some scary shit but I don't think it's as big as a risk as it is sometimes made about, but better to try and prevent it as even if caught it can ruin your credit history forever.
I think the more important questions are -Quote:
Originally Posted by Tyler_Durden
a. Why don't you own a garbage can?
and
b. How do you amass nine or ten bags of garbage in a week?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Icepick
I don't have the password for the account, nor the bank cards. Besides, is $12,000 really worth time in prison, if the whole thing backfires?
That sounds like a real bitch. Don't want those poor people learning how to read!Quote:
Originally Posted by arjue
Quote:
Originally Posted by burgundy
actually we know the person who did it, and they were quite well off, moreso than us even. She was just a major tight ass.
he needs alot of food to spout out the enormous amounts of shit that he does here.Quote:
Originally Posted by cigsthecat
That is an abnormal amount of garbage. I dont even think my fraternity house produced that much garbage in an average week.
I dunno man, the morning after a particularly righteous kegger can really get up there as far as trash bags go. But then, it depends a lot on the type of bags. I could see someone stacking up nine of those kitchen trash bags real easy, whereas it'd take a monumental pile of crap to fill up nine hefty cinch sacks.Quote:
Originally Posted by diffusionx
Diff, do you live in a broken home? Is there garbage scattered all over the house, and do you have crackers and toothpaste for dinner? You can tell us.
Either that or they are fat people. Fat people make more trash, what with eating lots more and always spending paper towels on cleaning up things they didn'[t realize they knocked over.
Them's good eatin'.Quote:
Originally Posted by Master
Could be the cops. The local cops took a bunch of my friends garbage before they raided his house 'cause they thought he was a drug dealer.Quote:
Originally Posted by Kenshin
Was he?
No, but he was a major pothead and they found a bunch of seeds in his trash. When they raided his house they found a pipe and a stolen roadsign. Big time bust.
That would ruin my day.
This thread is awesome.
Seriously. If Tyler is wiping his ass then trashing the paper, he's got bigger problems than someone stealing his garbage.Quote:
Originally Posted by Grave
:lol: :lol:Quote:
Originally Posted by Master
Christ. I just pulled that number out of my ass, I didn't know you guys scrutinize it so much. It could have been four or five bags, I really didn't count (I didn't take the trash out either). I also cleaned my room this week and threw a bunch of old magazines and boxes and stuff out.Quote:
Originally Posted by cigsthecat
man that made me spit my beer all over the monitor. many thanks :DQuote:
Originally Posted by Dolemite
it was me. we had an argument in some thread and as revenge I went over to your house and JACKED you. Yeah...I got you back! I win!! Who's the bitch now!?