I seriously need some advice right now.

I didn't want to post this, but I am getting really desperate now about my current situation.

My day had a quad-heart bypass surgury about a month ago. He got out and seemed to be recovering well, then for some reason his lungs was filling with water. He was supposed to be out this week but they extended into another week because he got worse.

The problem is that I feel like I may be contributing to it. I have been going through one giant slump of depression right now for about a year where I basically just turtle myself inside my house and rarely go out. My mom says that my dad is really worried about me, and he has a sad look in his eyes every time he sees me.

It isn't like I could magically become happy and do something with my life with somekind of biological switch, but still, I feel like I am partially to blame for the condition he is in now.

You most likely are (no offense, but that's the way we operate as a species). But no one can give you a magical remedy. For example, I have no idea why you are depressed. Does it run in your family? Is it because of his condition? You have to attack the core of the problem. Mental dissorders run in my family, and I didn't think I was going to have it happen to me. But I was diagnosed with severe panic disorder a while back. I didn't want to do anything. I missed most of the last semester of my HS career (I have the transcript to prove it ;/) I came out of it, but went back into it even further after a year of college. I took time off, became very sedentary again, ballooned in weight. I had to give myself something to strive for. So I started exercising again, talk to a psychiatrist, and what not. I've felt pretty good since. So the most important thing I would say (other than some kind of medical treatment) is to have some sort of goal and attain it at any cost, and then it picks up from there.

I have been seeing psychiatrists and psychologists for the last decade or so and none of them have given me a clear diagnosis of my problem. My depression is kinda complicated.

But it seriously sucks ass to know that you are killing your father a day at a time just by being yourself. :(

That's the thing though. Not to try to play psychiatrist here, but it seems like you think you have no ability to change yourself. Start with simple things, like eating right (see, I really like this one, it takes very little) or trying to make friends (more beneficial than the other one, but you have to work at something like this). The medical answer to why you are the way you are is only one small part of it. Go out and bowl or something. Bowling is easy.

Damian, have you tried any medication?

FHUTA.

Why are you depressed?

I am supposed to be on 300mg's of Zoloft, but since I lost all motivation in my life, I can never get myself to buy the damn drugs or get myself out of the house or basically do anything. I am supposed to be undergoing motivational therapy now, but since they are currently restructuring the mental health teams in Australia, no one is guiding me through it now.

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Originally Posted by Damian79

I am supposed to be on 300mg's of Zoloft, but since I lost all motivation in my life, I can never get myself to buy the damn drugs or get myself out of the house or basically do anything. I am supposed to be undergoing motivational therapy now, but since they are currently restructuring the mental health teams in Australia, no one is guiding me through it now.

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Look, being depressed sucks. No advice we can give you is going to do a damn thing to help. You say you feel bad that you might be contributing to your father's failing health? So stop sulking and make an effort to change what's wrong.

You've lost all motivation in your life, fine. Then you've given up on your father then too.

If you care about a damn thing, and it seems like you really do love your father and detest seeing him this way, try. Maybe talk to him about it, you know? Maybe you two can help each other out some. If you want to get your life in order, you have to be the one to do it. I hate to sound harsh, but it's all I found to be true.

Are you sure you don't have an issue with fatigue? Eat your fruits and vegees if you don't. Fatigue + depression can be areally bad deal.

My father takes Zoloft (as do millions of people as you already know)...he deals with things by doing work around the house and whatnot. That's his "hobby".