Top Ten Worst (and best) things about having a broken hand. (now with one xray)

Worst things:

10. Everyone asks me if I broke my hand by punching a wall. Is this standard male activity?

9. Having to repeat to everyone that I broke my hand "running in the house." It makes me come off as lame and it's obnoxious having to retell the story to everyone.

8. Masturbation via free web porn is difficult: you can't scroll through pics and jerk off at the same time. Constructing slideshows is obnoxious.

7. Trying to drive and operate the radio. (Especially when some atrocious shit comes on just as you're hitting a merge.)

6. Trying to do up your own fly one-handed.

5. Having to bag it for showers/the stink of a weeks-old unwashed sweaty hand. (multiply the belly button of a fat guy by an unwashed anus by post-workout armpits and you'll get an idea.) Also, Trying to wash my left arm and armpit.

4. Typing/using a mouse lefty.

3. No videogames/sports.

2. Being unable to fill out paperwork/sign things without it looking like I'm a five-year-old.

1. Learning how to wipe with the opposite hand.

And also the ever-present ITCH and general discomfort.

Best things:

10. It's neat to finally have broken a bone. I wouldn't want to go through life without experiencing that once.

9. My new splint looks and feels like a cool cyborg style gun arm. Only made of fiberglass and ace bandages.

8. People cut my food for me. Pre-cut food rules, one of the reasons I love japanese food.

7. Being told to "Just relax."

6. Freaking people out with my x-rays.

5. "Smell my finger."

4. Excused from most heavy labor.

3. My left hand dexterity is increasing.

2. My girlfriend has offered to bathe me.

1. My girlfriend - "I'M GETTING SEX!! I'll be on top."

Seriously though, it's not really cool. I feel useless, even though I try to do as much as I can. Stupid shit like not being able to stick a straw in a goddamn Capri Sun really gets to me.

Thi new splint actually lets me hold a controller, though awkwardly, but I don't want to push it. That said, I probably shouldn't have played ddr yesterday.

I'll try to get pictures of my x-rays up here.

Actually, I think the real worst thing is when the doctor grabs you by your broken broken bone and asks you if it hurts. Then when you say "yes" he goes ahead and wrenches the shit around until it's back in place. The Dr. told me I went white.

I don't think I've ever seen a hand cast before. I broke my foot a couple of years ago, so I know what it's like to shower with one of those bag thingies over your cast.

Can't wait to see pictures of your hand cast.

Yet another one of those "Cowutopia talks too much" threads.

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Originally Posted by diffusionx

Yet another one of those "Cowutopia talks too much" threads.

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IBTN

They didn't set it in a cast actually. The ER put me in a two piece fiberglass splint, and the ortho put me in a new splint that crawls up around my arm.

The fiberglass shit is really neat. It starts off as pliable as cloth, and when you run it under some water it sets off a chem. reaction. The splint gets really hot, and you've got to hold it in place while the doctor wraps it up. It hardens in about a minute.

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Originally Posted by Cowutopia

They didn't set it in a cast actually. The ER put me in a two piece fiberglass splint, and the ortho put me in a new splint that crawls up around my arm.

The fiberglass shit is really neat. It starts off as pliable as cloth, and when you run it under some water it sets off a chem. reaction. The splint gets really hot, and you've got to hold it in place while the doctor wraps it up. It hardens in about a minute.

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I'm not sure which kind of cast I got, but this sounds it. I didn't get plaster because I'd have to use crutches, so I sprung for the walking cast. I had to buy a bunch of new socks because I stretched my old ones out to fit over my cast. When they took it off it was 10x cooler. They used a saw.

What texture does it have? like a fine net?

Well it's all under ace bandages now. It looks..like styrofoam padding covered on top with white webbing.

That's what you get for having a hand.

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Originally Posted by Cowutopia

8. Masturbation via free web porn is difficult: you can't scroll through pics and jerk off at the same time. Constructing slideshows is obnoxious.

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:lol:

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1. My girlfriend - "I'M GETTING SEX!! I'll be on top."

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Now that just fucking rules.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by diffusionx

Yet another one of those "Cowutopia talks too much" threads.

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He does talk too much, but I actually don't mind him at all. This thread is still better then about 90% of the other new ones.