2 chili dogs + 1 "Fresh" Turkey sandwich from 7-eleven = hershey squirts (or chili - it's the same consistency).
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2 chili dogs + 1 "Fresh" Turkey sandwich from 7-eleven = hershey squirts (or chili - it's the same consistency).
Your fault, you had chili dogs from 7-11. It's basically signing a waiver claiming no fault on their part for whatever might come out of your anus over the next 48 hours.Quote:
Originally Posted by Type Ryan
Not really compaining. I knew what I was getting myself into. I'm just amazed that what I ate came out in the exact same way coming in.
I used to eat a 7-11 dog for lunch with a bag of doritos every day. I stopped, and it took about 2 weeks for my stomach to recover.
Every shit doesn't have to be a painful and depressing ordeal. I'm so excited to be alive.
This is completely false. If your shits don't burn like fire and make you want to die, you might want to check between your legs, I have a feeling a vagina is growing down there.Quote:
Originally Posted by Josh
Also, sloppy fire shits rule :insert tubgirl pic:
Can't get this girl out of my mind and all this liquor hasn't helped me sleep.
lol. I don't know why, but my shits lately have been ace. They're really firm and come out quick, clean first wipe. Its like I'm shitting out quartz stones.
Ya know what bugs me? TNL talking about their collective bowel movements.
Seriously fellas.
Class it up a bit, yeah? <waits for obligatory obscene photoshop>
Quote:
Originally Posted by arjue
Sorry, but it's really funny.Quote:
Originally Posted by The_Meach
Those are the best arjue, it means you're having a good day.
I was baking most of this week (it's my stress habit, I bake rather compulsively when something is bothering me) and last night I decided to make 4 dozen muffins. I was taking a batch out of the oven and the pan slipped, so I moved suddenly to catch it, and ended up pressing my arm against the oven door. Blistered immediately, blah. I have a 1 centimeter or so patch that is open, yellow, and rather oozy right now, and a 2x5 inch or so red, wrinkly contracted area around it. Still fucking hurts.
At least the muffins were delicious.
The best kind of shitting is when it comes out as a spray, almost, because of the extreme force and loose viscosity; like a bottle of lighter fluid on its last legs being forced out. You imagine that this shit is coating the entire bowl. Imagine your surprise when you go to wipe and this legendary shit has left you completely clean. Instead of your asshole being a hazard area you wipe and there's nothing there. Of course you spend 3 or 4 more sheets searching around your anus just to confirm the news.
That is a legendary shit. I've only had it happen maybe 4 times in my entire life, but I remember each day as if it were yesterday.
That's probably the best post I've ever read.
It certainly was amazing. Wow.Quote:
Originally Posted by A Robot Bit Me
Hi Aurora!!!
http://www.sciam.com/media/externaln...SCHOSIS-DC.jpgQuote:
Originally Posted by Nomi
HAY ARE WE STILL GOING TO DENNY'S 2NITE MSSGE ME BACKPLZ?!1Quote:
Originally Posted by Pineapple
My shits are in a class all their own.Quote:
Originally Posted by The_Meach
Moons over your Hammy ftw. With the free sundae afterwards. Don't go soft on me here.Quote:
Originally Posted by Aurora
I can totally confirm this.Quote:
Originally Posted by Mykozo
No I can't, but I wish I could. :)
I found a pair of snooty jeans today in a box. unfortunately they are bootcut and make me look like a woman. would someone like to buy some jeans? they're some serious ball grabbers.
not if they're the pair you wore in Texas...
For some reason, server upgrade = not being able to print double sided documents in excel. I would usually average 1000-1500 prints of double sided documents a day, so this is bad (less work now = more work later).
Wear them non-stop for a week under sweaty conditions, and I'll think about it.Quote:
Originally Posted by Josh
I'd wager that I've been in that race a bit longer than you. Yes it is one thing if you are kid going on your parents dime, it's quite another to be 28 and trying to attend a university that makes no concession for someone who maintains full-time employment.Quote:
Originally Posted by Type Ryan
This situation always sucks. You have my sympathy. Just keep a cool head and stay so busy you don't have time to twist on it.Quote:
Originally Posted by Atlas
my Dad just tried to slap a beer cozy on my beer (think Snap Bracelets from the 90's, but to go around beer) and thus spilled my beer all over my mouse... it's now working only in small spurts. I'm not about to tell my dad he owes me a $40 mouse. Fuck, this is at least semi upsetting, yet strangely (besides a terrible customer who should fucking die and never come to my store again) the worst thing thats happened all day. I guess I can count today as a win.
Just ended a five-year relationship with my girlfriend last night.
It happened quite suddenly, without any real argument, though it was not totally unexpected.
I'm still not sure how I feel about it. Part of me is excited about reentering the singles scene, but another part is dreading it.
Honestly, the things that are bugging me the most right now are the quotidian ones: having to find a new apartment, having to change my address, having to move all my shit in the blazing late summer Arizona sun.
That's pretty much how I felt about ending my 2 year 4 month relationship, I know not as serious but it was still like "Woo I could go out with new people" and at the same time "Ugh." Eventually I started missing her, and then thought of the reasons it ended, and now I am in a state of not really caring for a little bit.
Keeper IMO. If your man is hungry all he has to do is buy some women's perfume you don't own and spray it on his neck.Quote:
Originally Posted by Nomi
That's really wierd. Was your relationship becoming habit or something, cause you don't seem that upset about losing her.Quote:
Originally Posted by sleeve
That's really wierd. Was your relationship becoming habit or something, cause you don't seem that upset about losing her.Quote:
Originally Posted by sleeve
I think TNL has an echo... echo... echo.. ech...
Nah, I wouldn't really say that. It's just the way I feel right now. Any relationship falls into habit after a period of time, but ever since my girlfriend got into Second Life the relationship went further and further down that rabbit hole.Quote:
Originally Posted by AstroBlue
At this point in my life, if someone tells me they want out of a relationship for what I consider to be a pretty stupid reason, it makes me question why they persevered in the relationship up to that point. It's like, if you're going to throw away five years over something like this, I'm not going to beg you to stay.
I wouldn't beg anybody to stay regardless of scenario. It sounds like it happened so suddenly that it hasn't really sunk in for you yet.Quote:
Originally Posted by sleeve
relationships are gay. anyone in a relationship is gay. that is all. you can thank me later. :)
Have to go to Boston this labor day weekend (instead of chilling at my own home).... sucks.
Boston is fun... go get some.
Johnny Damon.
You just need to bake and send muffins to all the cool people of tnl. :tu:Quote:
Originally Posted by Nomi
My air-conditioner stopped working in my car this week. Of all the times for it to break. Well, I know what I'll be doing this weekend.
Say no more. You should have pulled the plug on that relationship the day she made her first avatar.Quote:
Originally Posted by sleeve
Ew, Second Life? My condolences sleeve.
I just found another hole on one of my teeth. I cancelled my last dentist appointment because there wasn't enough money in the house to pay for it. My car just died, my brother's car just died, and that means I'm getting to and from work in my parent's car, which isn't always available. Anyways, all my money is gone and I have to consider getting my first credit card and buying a shitty used car just to get where I have to be. That means paying money I wasn't trying to pay right now. And my dog is 17 yrs old and seems to be on her way out. I'm going to be fucking crushed when this dog passes away.
I started school this week and I too started my new schedule at work. I'm pretty much never getting a day off ever again. I have to work every weekend for 8 hours a day and work 8 hours on the days I don't have school, plus 8 hours on one of the days I do have school (which I did today). It's gonna be a bitch but I'm glad to be getting somewhere with my life.
What the hell is Second Life? This? Girls play the dumbest games. It's online games or The Sims.
I just found out they cancelled john from cincinatti. i have to wait until 9-11-2014 to see what's going to happen.
It wasn't over some stupid online affair, but yeah, Second Life is pretty awful.Quote:
Originally Posted by Mykozo
Boston has Grave. As a result, it is the greatest city in the world.
your horn has been tooted. enjoy that.
If it didn't cost money (and was legal... perishable goods and such) I'd totally do it.Quote:
Originally Posted by BonusKun
That sucks. I was starting to get in to that show (i've only seen 2 episodes On Demand, now I guess there's no point). Atleast Conchords is still alive and well.Quote:
Originally Posted by Hubbitron
Who's Grave?Quote:
Originally Posted by Grave
Of course it is. It's so accessible. Showtime and HBO had better get it together or I'm leaving them. Let's reflect on great shows that were canceled at their apex;
Carnivale
Dead Like me
Arrested Development
John From Cincinatti
Huff
anyone want to add anything?
Firefly. Although I guess that show wasn't at the APEX what with only like 6 shows being aired and the 2 hour pilot not actually being shown until the last episode to air. I love westerns and I can get in to sci-fi really easily if the lead kicks ass. This show had both, and clever dialogue. Atleast the cool space cinematography of this show lives on with Battlestar Gallactica. Although I never really watch that show so it could have changed.
I really liked Arrested Development, but that show was on Fox and Fox gave it WAY more leeway than any other show I've ever heard of on their network. Usually Fox is quick to cut a show off and burn the remains (this past fall Head Cases, a legal drama, aired literally 1 episode before being cancelled). With AD they actually gave it a second, and to my surprise, a THIRD season. Seemingly nobody was willing to watch, nobody bit, so they scrapped it. This is one instance where the fans fucked the show by not supporting it, not the network.
I liked the Black Donnelly's until the second episode. That show could have been awesome if they didn't just turn it in to Dawson's Creek for the Irish. The first episode oozed style and wit. The second fucked all of that work.
If we want to include anything:
Freaks and Geeks
Firefly
Futurama
I'd also like to throw a bigass fuck you out to HBO for Carnivale... shit just got really really fucking good and they cancel it. GODDAMMIT.
I guess it's really not the fault of the premium channels. It's the people. FUCK YOU PEOPLE THAT LET MY SHOWS GET CANCELED.
Yeah, Fox actively tried to kill Firefly from the beginning.Quote:
Originally Posted by Drewbacca
Fuck Fox.
Quote:
Originally Posted by bbobb
I'M STILL REALLY SORE ABOUT THIS ONE.
They better make a fucking movie or something. I really want to know how that shit ends.
Didn't they write it as the series went on?
From what I understand it started that way, but they had a plan starting around season 2. I think it was supposed to be either 1 or 2 more seasons for the rest of the arc.Quote:
Originally Posted by Hubbitron
GOD DAMMIT.
Oh and that new Andy Richter show Conan O'Brien produced where he was a private investigator was awesome.
Seriously.
FUCK HBO. I WILL NEVER SUPPORT THEM AGAIN.
Edit: This is in reference to Hubb.. not Drew's stupid Andy Richter show.
I like Entourage and I like FOTC but after they canceled John I really could do without the other shows.
They INVITED Joss Whedon to make a show on their network. He was reluctant, but decided to do it (I guess they payed him off well) and they cancelled it on him. There's no way it could have been successful.Quote:
Originally Posted by bbobb
I was a little disappointed with the way Serenity panned out too. They didn't use Book at all and never really explored why he wasn't with the crew.
It was stupid but that's why it was awesome. It reminded me a lot of the first two seasons of The Simpsons.Quote:
Originally Posted by bbobb
FOTC benefits from trailing Entourage, doesn't it? When did John air during the week?Quote:
Originally Posted by Hubbitron
Quote:
Originally Posted by bbobb
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hubbitron
Truth. At least there's still Deadwood.
Speaking of which, did anyone notice that several characters in "John from Cincinatti" were in Deadwood?
Lately my concentration has become worse (Suggesting I may need to go back on medication) which has been drastically hurting my ability to work, which has resulted in the full time position I had for sure going up as public in which I have to formally apply for it now. So I've screwed up big time, but until I get full time I can't get medical insurance to try and figure out if there is actually medicine that will help (Gone from Ridilin up and pretty much became immune to each medication at one point).
So I'm worried about losing my job and I guess having some insecurities about the fact that if I try to focus on things I just start to get sick. (Which I feel very sick right now as well and am in a pretty fucked up mood)
would you like me to mail you some cookies? they're good for what ails ya.
I seem to be the only person who knows where to go to get herbal happiness and I'm going to a party tonight and have already been asked by 4 people to pick them up some. So I have to go spend $160 of my own cash (which is about all I have right now) and only some of those people are saying they'll have my money tonight. That's annoying.
its fucking hot here. AC is on and not helping at all.
I can only assume that Fox left that show on the air for so long because they themselves couldn't believe that the audience was so small, and figured that it would eventually catch on. Alas, the general public is too stupid and boring to get into a smart, off-the-wall sitcom like AD, and that shit bugs me.Quote:
Originally Posted by Drewbacca
AD wasn't the easiest show to get into if you didn't watch it from the start.
Doubt it. Every episode explains everything important that was missed.
like Quantum Leap?
no, wait... I guess not.
Totally. Their are tons of flashbacks with narrative explaining the current debacle.Quote:
Originally Posted by Hubbitron
I don't get to go to band practice today cuz my 21 yr old sister is being mass baptized in the lake near my house. Balls. And it happens right after work, so I have no down time. I know it's a big Christain/Catholic thing, but doesn't 8 people wearing white robes getting dunked into water at the same time while someone utters prayers sound a bit, I dunno, cultish?
Perhaps, but it's important to support your family, and this is a big day for her and she wants you there. Just bear with it.
My gripe is that my A/C in my car works and some times it doesn't. Try going to lunch at 12 noon with no A/C in 100 degree heat. I've had two mechanics look at it and find nothing wrong. My freon levels are great. I've gotta find out what's going on.
I know, it wasn't a big deal, and actually it was a pretty nice little service (besides the preacher going off like it was his last Sunday ever). They dunked a blind guy, that was funny.Quote:
Originally Posted by FX
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pineapple
Oh boy.
False metal is pissing me off today. Usually I don't care at all but today it's giving me a poor disposition. It's just everywhere... :(
No, it's over too. There was talk of a couple of two hour movies to wrap everything up but it's doubtful that that will ever happen.Quote:
Originally Posted by Type Ryan
Whats buggin me today?
Man I spent the day at South Beach looking at hot broads with my sometimes girlfriend, her cousin visiting from Jersey and roommate and all I can think of was humping all three. Especially after dinner when her cousin bent over to pick up something she dropped (I don't even know what it was) as she bent over right in front of my crotch and made contact :sweat: oh the skinny dipping story they were telling me they did yesterday when they got caught by the beach patrol that I missed out on. Now they went out for girls night out... I'm home about to look for some porn cuz I refuse to jerk off to this.
They think you're gay. You need to hit on (and proposition) them more.
The guy in the background doesn't turn on you on enough? I mean look at that ass.
That bitch got some child-bearing hips and some serious junk in the trunk. FHUTA imo. All you have to do is ask if you can.
Never that I actually was put out my misery when she called early this morning for some loving. (the sometimey gf that is)Quote:
Originally Posted by Drewbacca
DisgustQuote:
Originally Posted by Thief Silver
They both do.Quote:
Originally Posted by Mykozo
I'm working on Labor Day and it's gorgeous outside. That is all.
One of my dart frogs died :cry:
that blows, those creatures are too cool
That sucks, I'm sorry to hear it. :( How many do you have? Do you have any pictures? I'd like to see.Quote:
Originally Posted by icarusfall
This is the one that died - Hades. He had been acting a bit funny, but there's not really anything you can do for them since they're so small and biologically unknown. We still have another one called Artimus - he's a green and black one.
http://i149.photobucket.com/albums/s...all/hades1.jpg
I imagine we'll get another one or two sometime here. It's not like one of my cats died, but it's still unfortunate.
I want to here what "this" wasQuote:
Originally Posted by sleeve
Pets dying is always terrible. I mean, I never got attached to the mantis like I did to my dogs, but it'd be hard not to develop a bond with something that you care for and see every day.Quote:
Originally Posted by icarusfall
Curious about the dart frogs, I've never seen them as pets before. Aren't they ridiculously poisonous? Was a cute little guy, though.
They're not poisonous in captivity as long as they were captive bred. The poison that coats their skin in the wild is developed from eating red ants and converting their poisons into an even more concentrated form that's secreted on their skin. If you get one from the wild no one's really sure how long it takes for the poison to dissipate - might take a month, might take 2 years. No one really want to have to find out since touching a frog and then your eye would most certainly kill you. A good rule is to just never touch them unless absolutely necessary - like when you change their substrate a few times a year.
More info here.
I just walked by Kevin Durant outside my apartment about 25 mins ago and didn't recognize him because it was dark outside.
Then my friend who I was with went into her apartment and found out he was just in there hanging out with her roommates.
You can't go to UMD and not know about Len Bias homey.
Nigga went out the right way.
LAWL:
I always get scared as shit in that shopping centerQuote:
Jay Bias
On December 11, 1990, Bias's younger brother Jay, a promising high school basketball player, was shot to death in a dispute in the parking lot of Prince George's Plaza, a Hyattsville shopping mall located just miles from the University of Maryland.
Fuck. I guess this explains the carry over of certain cast members to John from Cincinatti.Quote:
Originally Posted by Saint of Killers
lawl stupid athletes. I'd love to see him as a zombie.Quote:
Originally Posted by Mykozo
Late to the party, but IAWTP. AD is constantly self-referencing (in a witty way, not in the "HAY GUYS 'MEMBER THIS! LOL!" post-resurrection Family Guy way) and foreshadowing; entire episodes can fly over the head of first-time viewers. That's not to say it isn't the best sitcom of all time, though.Quote:
Originally Posted by Rumpy
too bad David Cross is not and has never been funny, nor has he ever been a part of anything funny
ever
Mr. Show says hi.
Also, to anyone who has watched and disliked Arrested Development, I will buy you a DVD season of your choice of either Will & Grace or Friends.
This is a trick, since you undoubtedly own the entire libraries of both!
Mr. Show is not funny