Josh is fucking old

Happy birthday!

<3

Way old. ~ HB QT ~

Happy birfday nig

He's only got a year on me. Next year's the big 30 for him.

Time to kill yourself rock star

Happy birthday!

I still feel way too young to be on these boards. It's even been over 4 years, fuck.

Am I too old to die young?

HB Josh!

Happy Birthday Josh, this year we should do a Heavy Weapon partyagain

Cheers to the fucking stud!

Please don't die. You know, because of how old you are.

Happy Birthday.

You've outlived some excellent musicians. Happy birthday!

Fishbowl fuck yourself.

And Videotape it for all to see.

hb hrd rkr imo

WHERE'S THE PROG ROCK ALBUM?

http://img152.imageshack.us/img152/5...akejoshbg9.jpg

HB2U Josh, have a swell day. :chick:

Happy Birthday!

hbjosh

Wait, it's Josh's birthday again already? WTF. Screw off, oldie.

Happy Birthday Jackass.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Josh

I am not a writer. So this is going to jump all over the place. Sorry in advance.

I was born in Bethesda Naval Hospital on December 11th 1978. The song playing on the radio when my parents took me home was "Dust in the Wind".

Home at the time was Bowie Maryland. I was an extremely bright, and happy child. My first memory was sitting on the floor of the kitchen, and tossing a pot lid across the room. My first words were "arf arf" at four months. I tought myself to read before my second birthday. I remember something about home schooling, I think my mom and some of her friends tried to start up a school of sorts (my mom was a teacher) I kind of remember having "visitors" to the "school" and things not going well. I entered Pointer Ridge Elementary for first grade. This is when things went downhill.

I didn't enjoy school, and began to dread going there. My parents decided I needed me some Jesus, or something, so they sent me to Holy Trinity Episcipal Day School at the start of second grade.

Bad move.

I was in nothing but trouble until I was expelled in third grade. This was around the time that I started playing Ice Hockey. I had played Baseball, and Soccer before this. Wrestled for a while too. Once I found hockey, that was it.

Back in Pointer Ridge. I was enrolled in Talented and Gifted classes because everyone thought I was some kind of child prodigy. I was there until we moved to Crofton Maryland 1991 at the start of middle school.

Middle school was worse than elementary school. I made friends pretty quickly (two of which I am still friends with to this day) but hated every second of being there. I got in verbal altercations with my teachers, was suspended a lot, and I stopped doing homework. I got in a fight with my friend Ryan (the drummer) and dropped him with the doom punch. :)
Eight grade was the year that I stoppped dreaming. The insomnia would come later.

The summer between eighth and ninth grade I went to Russia for three weeks. Not much happened there that I remember, but I met a really nice girl named Aleisha while on the trip. Turns out she was from Crofton too, to make a long story short we dated for a few years, I knocked her up, and her parents moved her to Wisconsin. I never saw her, or heard from her again.

I started my first band in tenth grade, think we were called "Fungus Amungus" or "Bubblehead" I forget. We had trash cans, and a shower stool for drums, and I had a bass that I ran through a stereo. We rocked. This was around the time that I first started getting into punk rock. This is also around the time that I really started getting into drugs.

School was still hell, but nothing too special was going on. In either 10th or 11th grade I found myself in a pop punk band called "Lemon Joy" yes... like the soap. We played a fair amount of shows, and recorded two albums which did pretty well. At the end of 12th grade the band broke up.

All throughout high school I had lots of stupid jobs. I think I worked at every fast food place imaginable. Walked out of every single one. I think I have quit one job correctly in my entire life. That was at the Sports Authority.

The summer between 10th and 11th grade I went to the beach at least four times a week with my friends Judy, Megan and Jay. I had some of the best times of my life, and I miss those three kids more than anything.

December 7th 1996 I stopped doing drugs. I was tired of it. I had taken hundreds of hits of acid, and probably smoked acres of pot, along with every other kind of drug imaginable. It was time to stop.

After graduating High School (with a 1.973 the cut off was 1.97 so I was pretty much at the bottom of my class) I enrolled in Frostburg State University. I got in based on my SAT scores, and my skill in photography. Hated every second of it. Ended up dropping almost all of my classes, and skipping the classes I had left. I was kicked out after two semesters.

Then I came home, met Liz, and we moved to Philly so I could go to the Art Institute up there. It was alright for a bit. Then I realized I was dirt poor, living in a converted washroom, and in a city that I hated. I dropped out after two semesters and came back to MD.

I borrowed some money from my parents and bought a house, back in Crofton. Went to a few schools. Graduated from Omega Studios as a Pro Recording Engineer, and a Pro MIDI Engineer. Got my MCSE and A+ certifications (useless!) from Johns Hopkins. Started taking classes at Community College, and dropped out. Bounced around from weird job to weirder job. (Selling vaccume cleaners door to door... ouch) until I got a "temporary seasonal position" at Funcoland. A few months later I was promoted to assistant manager at Babbages. A few months later I was a Store Manager. A few months later I was unemployed. But we've been over this Babbages crap before... its still on the boards somewhere, in case you missed it.

After this I got a job with Korly making smoothies for the people. I think I worked at an arcade around this time too. Eventually I moved out of my house to go to Baltimore and have a 3 month weekend with some friends. I came back and about one year later my girl moved out and here I am. Back on the drugs, back on the drink, and in a large empty house by myself.

Today I am 25. I am unemployed. I hate my life, and I drink too much.

P.S. I'm pretty sure I'm missing a year or two in here somewhere, and I know I've left out a lot of things. Most of those things, like the bands, and the Texas rockstar thing are still on the boards if you're interested.

---

http://img145.imageshack.us/img145/5...tsecakenk0.jpg

31,000 and goin' strong!

Happy Birthday I hope you're either fucked up or fucking tonight.

you miss steak. admit it.
happy birthday ya homo.http://neatorama.cachefly.net/images...bunny-cake.jpg

I'll make you and I some gin and geritol when we meet up, fellow old man.

Happy Bday yoooooooooooo.

Holy shit at that thread Doc dug up.

Mine pretty much covers me up to that point quite well.

happy birthday...still in your twenties!

Quote:

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I tought myself to read before my second birthday.

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lol.

Don't buy into the old shit, Josh. Life just starts to end at 30.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Yoshi

Don't buy into the old shit, Josh. Life just starts to end at 30.

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so when did yours start to end from the marriage and all.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Dyne

so when did yours start to end from the marriage and all.

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You see, what was good about Yoshi's is that it made sense without the spoilers. Then you look at the spoiler and you're all "Oh, lol, what a difference two words make."

happy birthday man.

Suicide self your old SOB.

Happy Birthday young man.

HB Sucka. May your day be free of Sass.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Shin Johnpv

Happy Birthday I hope you're either fucked up or fucking tonight.

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The smart money's on both and two. His girl Harley, and the concubine they hired to play with.

happy birthday.

Now wait, does that mean joker and harley (+ concubine dressed as Poison Ivy) do a crime spree first or just go straight to fucking?

hb2u fag

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Yoshi

Don't buy into the old shit, Josh. Life just starts to end at 30.

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Its right when shit on your body begins to stop working correctly. And your Alcohol tolerence begins to drop.

You also being to notice that you have fallen out of the key 'Youth Demographic" and shit isn't being marketed to you anymore, you start seeing those cheesy only sold on TV album compulations and notice its all music from your high school days.

Getting old sucks. HB Josh!

Thanks for the ups people.

Heavy Weapon would be awesome. Thats pretty much the only thing I miss about not having a tv/internet.

I'm celebrating my birthday by having band practice, and picking my mom up from surgery. There is a GIANT bottle of Percocet that I just picked up for her taunting me.

I'm also going to open the giant box that I got from Nick. My birthday is more important that Jesus Day.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Mr-K

lol.

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I taught myself to spell when Firefox got a spell checker. This is the ONLY reason my posts don't have (as many) spelling errors. Of note: the "child prodigy" can't spell. I'm waiting for a built in grammar checker too.

Fun fact: Firefox suggests Percocet is actually spelled "Weathercock".

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Wildkat

...you start seeing those cheesy only sold on TV album compulations and notice its all music from your high school days.

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http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/...AL._AA130_.jpg

like this one?

HOW DO U TALK! TO AN ANGEL!

Amazon says 1997, but I know I bought those off Time Warner in '94 or 5. There were also two CDs, not one. EDIT: ok here we go, complete track list

I like that Mr. Big makes an appearance.

Happy Birthday Jesus!

...er, I mean Josh.

Oh lol. You guys bought me the Badtz-Maru bass.

haha awesome. thanks guys... how did you set this up?

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Josh

I'm also going to open the giant box that I got from Nick. My birthday is more important that Jesus Day.

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i'm requesting that you photograph this if it's the "box".

He's a penguin with a bad attitude.

I'm using my mom's computer, so no built in iSight 4u.

I'll get pictures, or a video of me being wanky with it later. Thanks to the long list of people, and dyne especially for setting it up. fuck the guy at amazon typing it out.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Josh

I'm using my mom's computer, so no built in iSight 4u.

I'll get pictures, or a video of me being wanky with it later. Thanks to the long list of people, and dyne especially for setting it up. fuck the guy at amazon typing it out.

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you opened it already? hope you like it. i saw it on your list and figured there was no way in hell you would expect it.

bitch

Its my birthday bitch, of course I opened the biggest box I could. Jesus is overrated.

Its pretty rad. I don't think it'll stand up to me playing a show with it, but its a perfect "practice at home" bass. Its small, like a guitar which is neat.

Happy Birthday, Josh! You rock :).

Happy Birthday, old man! :D

...so old, make pac-man say 'DAMN!'
If his age was a drug, he'd snort it by the gram.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Josh

I'll get pictures, or a video of me being wanky with it later. Thanks to the long list of people, and dyne especially for setting it up. fuck the guy at amazon typing it out.

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Nice, glad it worked out and you got it. HB/Jesus Day

happy birthday dude.

For a minute, let's go back to December 11, 1978... Hey - Ho Let's Go!

• Lufthansa heist: Six men rob a Lufthansa cargo facility in New York City's Kennedy airport.
• Two million demonstrate against the Shah in Iran.

#1 Song on the Billboards... December 9, Le Freak, Chic
(Road to Ruin was released earlier that September and I Wanna Be Sedated was later released as a single)

The Movies Released Friday, December 8th
The Brink's Job "The greatest true comedy robbery of all time!"
Force 10 from Navarone "The Odds Against Them Were 10,000 to 1...But What the Hell!"
The Deer Hunter "This Movie is So Bad Ass... It Doesn't Require a Tag Line"

Top 20 Movies of 1978
-1 Grease (Para.) Jul-78 $96.300 m
-2 Superman (WB) Dec-78 $82.800 m
-3 Animal House (Univ.) Jul-78 $70.826 m
-4 Every Which Way But Loose (WB) Dec-78 $51.900 m
-5 Jaws II (Univ.) Jun-78 $50.432 m
-6 Heaven Can Wait (Para) Jun-78 $49.400 m
-7 Hooper (WB) Jul-78 $34.900 m
-8 California Suite (Colu.) Dec-78 $28.386 m
-9 Cheech & Chong's Up in Smoke (Para.) Sep-78 $28.300 m
10 Foul Play (Para.) Jul-78 $27.500 m
11 The Deer Hunter (Univ.) Dec-78 $27.436 m
12 Revenge of the Pink Panther (UA) Jul-78 $25.406 m
13 The End (UA) May-78 $20.654 m
14 The Cheap Detective (Colu.) Jun-78 $19.203 m
15 Halloween (Compass) Oct-78 $18.500 m
16 Midnight Express (Colu.) Oct-78 $15.065 m
17 Coma (MGM) Jan-78 $14.539 m
18 House Calls (Univ.) Apr-78 $14.282 m
19 The Lord of the Rings (UA) Nov-78 $14.123 m
20 Coming Home (UA) Feb-78 $13.471 m

Ebert's Top 10 for 1978
-1. "An Unmarried Woman"
-2. "Days of Heaven"
-3. "Heart of Glass"
-4. "Stroszek"
-5. "Autumn Sonata"
-6. "Interiors"
-7. "Halloween"
-8. "National Lampoon's Animal House"
-9. "Kings of the Road"
10. "Superman"


EDIT: Video Games in 1978

• June - Taito Corporation releases the Space Invaders arcade game in Japan.
• October - Namco releases their first arcade game, Gee Bee in Japan.
• Konami Corporation releases Block Game, their first arcade game in the United States.
• Nintendo releases the Color TV Game 15 home console and the Computer Othello arcade game.
• SNK is founded.

And now... a fifteen-year-old girl's Diary Entry for December 11, 1978

Quote:

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Today was pretty fun. I tried to talk mom into letting me stay home because I had to work all week-end. But she wouldn't let me.

After school, ma took me to the Lakeview Library so I could check out the book that has the Broadcasting magazine address so I can suscribe to it. They didn't have it there so they called the Peoria Library & they had it. I applied for a card and checked it out. Ma & me are each paying $17.50 so I can suscribe. I'll mail it tomarrow.

I watched the Flintstones Christmas. Today was thrilling.

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I was born in Jan of the same year, 1978 was a good year.

February imo

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Josh

I'm using my mom's computer, so no built in iSight 4u.

I'll get pictures, or a video of me being wanky with it later. Thanks to the long list of people, and dyne especially for setting it up. fuck the guy at amazon typing it out.

---

I got the message from Nick.

Happy B-day you old fuck!:p

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Josh

Jesus is overrated.

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Yeah, Jesus's birthday has gone to the dogs.
I'm thinking of celebrating x-mas on December 11th from here on out.
Happy birthday, my Lord and Savior. :icepick:

Age doesn't matter until your dick stops working right. My Dad gave me that advice on my birthday once and now I bestow that piece of advice unto you.

Good advice

HB my friend.

I'll have to send you something else from the wishlist. My birthday is also in December (27th represent) and I'd feel like a bastard (read: all of my goddamn relatives while growing up) if that commie shirt counted as the dreaded combo gift. Least not will I be part of that.

HB, J-Smooth. You're almost as old as me. To honor your birthday, I will proceed to roll a nice fresh blunt and smoke it after I finish eating this ribeye.
I will then stand naked on my balcony while yelling your name for 5 minutes. It's kinda like a 21-gun salute.

HOLY SHIT! Nick! Change Josh's name to J-Smooth! Do it, do it now!

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Gooch

HB, J-Smooth. You're almost as old as me. To honor your birthday, I will proceed to roll a nice fresh blunt and smoke it after I finish eating this ribeye.
I will then stand naked on my balcony while yelling your name for 5 minutes. It's kinda like a 21-gun salute.

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Then piss a big "J" on the neighbor's house.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Shooting Love

Yeah, Jesus's birthday has gone to the dogs.
I'm thinking of celebrating x-mas on December 11th from here on out.
Happy birthday, my Lord and Savior. :icepick:

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Quote:

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Originally Posted by Gooch

HB, J-Smooth. You're almost as old as me. To honor your birthday, I will proceed to roll a nice fresh blunt and smoke it after I finish eating this ribeye.
I will then stand naked on my balcony while yelling your name for 5 minutes. It's kinda like a 21-gun salute.

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I've never felt cooler.

P.S. My birthday ruled. I played Ramones songs at band practice after eating only slightly fucked up food from Joe2. Before that I got my suit tailored lol court Now I'm stoned. Hooray!

Happy Birthday, Josh!

'Hope you don't get jacked for presents just because your birthday is in December. People always buy me one present and say, "This is both your birthday and Christmas present." Cheap bastards.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Nash

Happy Birthday, Josh!

'Hope you don't get jacked for presents just because your birthday is in December. People always buy me one present and say, "This is both your birthday and Christmas present." Cheap bastards.

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plz believe. My birthday is December 20th. My family celebrated neither while I was growing up, but we celebrate both now and that combo shit is prevalent.

Oh well, I guess it's better than nothing...and it's not really about the presents anyway (lol)

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Yoshi

Don't buy into the old shit, Josh. Life just starts to end at 30.

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This is true.

Happy Birthday Josh.