My parents are kicking me out...

yep...I'm kind of upset. I was planning to be out in 8 months anyway but it still stings a bit. I don't have nearly as much money as I should saved up. I make pretty decent money for being 19 (about 20,00-22,000 by the end of the year) but I'm still going to school (entering sophmore year at college). This puts quite a damper on my future plans, (as well as my plans to expand my gaming library, but i suppose that's the least of my worries).

Has anyone had a similar situation? Even though I've never had much of a relationship my parents but it still kinda hurts. How bout some basic survival tips? anything helps

I can sort of relate to the feeling. My mother kicked me out once while I was in middle school, only to realize how horrible it was and get over it. She claims it was some elaborate plan to punish me. I was suppose to not take her serious and just hang out in the yard until my dad came home, say I was sorry for whatever it was(if I recall correctly it was because I didn't want to mow the grass) and then everything be forgotten. Well I took her serious and left, shoeless. Sort of a odd feeling of loss, and just a general sadness of what it was going to do to my long term goals. In a odd turn of events how I reacted got her back though. I went to the preacher?s house (don?t ask why, made perfect sense to a middle schooler), so most likely her being a ass is known to many people now, this being a small town and all. Doesn?t really matter a lot in the end, it was resolved that same day and life went on. But it does make a good storey, 12 year old something IronPlant walking down the street shoeless.

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Originally posted by andyrose
If you're going to college, why would they kick you out? That's just wrong.

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I'm not sure. I'm not the most loving or open person but I've gotten 3.8 to 4.0 in high school and 3.6 to 3.8 thus far in college. I've been working since I was 14 and I've been full-time since I was 18. I've never asked my parents for a single penny since I was 15. Every possession I own, every article of clothing I own, and every car payment, insurance payment, and every ounce of gas has been paid by me. They've made me go to three different schools in three different semesters citing "financial reasons" but they jet off to Florida for vacation 2-3 times and year and spend thousands landscaping their house. And I've accomodated them and never complained every step of the way.

But they say that I am not "part of the family". I don't exactly have time for anything between full-time work, full-time school and full-time girlfriend.

On top of all of that, they asked me to pay 400 a month rent AFTER they told me that I had to move out of my dorm 6 months ago, and INVITED ME back into their house!!!!

Then they retract and kick me out!


phew...venting

Is you're mother going through menapaous (whatever)? Im just seeing a lot of self-center emotions going on there and not a lot of logic.

Your parents sound like real assholes. I can't fathom telling my kid that he's not part of the family, then kicking him out of the house when he's working and going to college. Noone should take that kind of treatment, especially from family.

I suppose that the best defense I can make for them is that I don't have much of a relationship with them at all, for whatever the reason. But it's not like I'm a terrible hardship. I know dozens of kids who are infinitely more spoiled, more irresponsible, and more detached than me and they are coddled by their parents. It's frustrating...I suppose their are two sides to every story: mine, my parents and then, somewhere in the middle, the truth, so I accept that I cannot relate the entire story or ever really understand. But I'm trying to figure out where I went grossly wrong and I just can't find it.

Anyway,


I may have to drop out of college for a year. I'm thinking of moving back to my home state (VT). How hard is it to get back into school after being out for a period of time? I really don't want to shoot myself in the foot as far as that goes. Anybody around here done that?

If you drop out of school, you won't ever want to go back. TRUST me...

phew...i'm glad i've got my parents - good people now that i think of it.

Your parents are dicks. Literaly, two Penis with arms and legs walking around in human cloths. That really sucks man and I feel bad for you.

Going back to college after quiting for a while can be hard on so many levels. Its hard to get used to the lifestyle again, of doing homework and studing. Its also hard if you are majoring in anything technical like in something related to engineering, or the medical field because that stuff really builds and you forget more the longer you go with out using it and learning about it.

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Originally posted by phoenix angel wing
If you drop out of school, you won't ever want to go back. TRUST me...

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Wise man...

It is hard to save up the money to go to college if you are out on your own.

I would like to go back, but I don't think it is ever going to happen.

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Originally posted by amerlop



I'm not sure. I'm not the most loving or open person but I've gotten 3.8 to 4.0 in high school and 3.6 to 3.8 thus far in college. I've been working since I was 14 and I've been full-time since I was 18. I've never asked my parents for a single penny since I was 15. Every possession I own, every article of clothing I own, and every car payment, insurance payment, and every ounce of gas has been paid by me. They've made me go to three different schools in three different semesters citing "financial reasons" but they jet off to Florida for vacation 2-3 times and year and spend thousands landscaping their house. And I've accomodated them and never complained every step of the way.

But they say that I am not "part of the family". I don't exactly have time for anything between full-time work, full-time school and full-time girlfriend.

On top of all of that, they asked me to pay 400 a month rent AFTER they told me that I had to move out of my dorm 6 months ago, and INVITED ME back into their house!!!!

Then they retract and kick me out!


phew...venting

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Never had a job, going to college on financial aid, 3.0 average GPA, and my parents don't charge me rent.

Something's up with your folks.

Ugh, my damn vision will probably keep me at home the rest of my life. I WISH I could go to college.

Thats fucked up, is all I can say.

After I graduated High School, one of the most horrible experiences of my life, the last thing I wanted to do was go to college, I toured all of two campuses my Junior and Senior years, and ended up going to a local community college where I quickly lost interest in even going to class. I dropped out eventually and went to work full time. I did that for almost two years before I decided I would never make enough money to live comftorably on, let alone get a job I like, unless I went back to class full-time.

After several hair-brained get a career quick schemes, I'm back on course taking classes and progressing towards my Associate's, then Bachelor's degrees. Its amazing how a couple of years working crap retail and office jobs will motivate one to get his ass back to class... :rolleyes:

That's a very sad tale amerlop. :(

I find it so strange the different kinds of relationships people have with their parents. It seems that at some point between the ages of 18 and 25 so many people have fallings out of some kind with their parents, some less serious than others. Bleh.

I know some people who have a free ride from their parents. People who have their Manhattam apartments paid for their folks and people whose parents pay their creditcard bills. Now that's just crazy. How can people even live with themselves? Anyway, I digress... my folks have helped me out a lot. I commuted to uni and I lived with my parents. I never really asked for money but they're helpful with the big things like uni/car/etc. I think your parents sound really harsh. Many parents would kill to have someone as responsible as you. You sound a lot more responsible than me - especially compared to when I was 19!

As far as going back to school is converned. I had two (unintentional) gaps in my university education, but it was not hard for me to go back. I actually looked forward to it and missed it. Even once I finally graduated 2 years ago, I still miss many aspects of uni. The thing is, going back was pretty easy for me because I did have my parents support and help and I ended up living at home. If you're working full time to support yourself and go to uni it can be pretty rough. I know a few people who had to do that. Regardless, I recommend trying to stick with it if you can manage it.

Also, if you're thinking of going home to Vermont you may want to consider going a bit further north to Québec or Ottawa. Canadian universities are (usually) significantly cheaper and it takes less time to get your degree. Just something to consider...

Anyway, I wish you the best of luck with whatever you decide to do and also for your relationship with your parents.

Pfft, your parents suck. You should definatly talk to them in a high pitched voice and include many explatives. :)

man, Have you tried talking to them about it? sometimes that can help alot...


Any examples of course prices in Canada? I've always wanted to go there, and if studying is cheap there (relative to Australia) I might go.

yes, the canadian thing intrigues me...how are the prices up there? How long do you think it would take to get residency? I bet apartments in the city are wicked expensive, right?

Damn, man that sucks. Sorry to say, but I agree that your parent act like real assholes, and very selfish.

My parents never did anything like that to me, and only reason I couldnt live with them back in the day, was they were living in the appartment, and couldnt have extra residents. So I had to rent my own place while goin to school, but they always helped me in other ways.

And I will never do that to DJ, sure he will have to support himself when he grows up, but I'm not going to kick him out just for fun, when he done anything wrong.

Hope you find the way out of that mess man. Good luck :)

Bah.

Suck it up and welcome to the real world.

I moved out when I was 16 because my parents were moving out of state. I didn't want to move away from my friends and school at the time so I stayed.

I got a place with my g/f at the time and finished out HS (graduating early also).

I'm 24 now, and have owned my own home for the last year. My current g/f of 4 years is working part time and is double majoring (she starts medical school next year).

From what you've said about your folks, sounds like you should've quit relying on them for anything a long time ago.

*not personally trying to flame anybody, just pointing out that life can suck...but you can presivere if you work hard enough*

Wow... that is so weird. It's like your parents just stopped liking you and even though you're blood and kin, they're dropping you like a bad habit. You sound like a good guy, I don't think it's your fault at all. Is it your spending habits? Is your gaming taking up too much room in their house? Or do you think they want you to be completely independent?

My mom always jokes around about how I should move back home and pay rent to her but I can't get over the idea of staying with my parents for the rest of my life. I mean... issues of girlfriends and privacy... those are important to me. :) Good luck man, I'm sure only good things will come your way...

Man, your parents sound like flaming retards. Seriously there's no excuse for what they are doing to you unless you somehow are making their lives difficult, which it doesn't sound like you are doing.

As for dropping out, I wouldn't advise it. It may make things difficult financially, but if you do drop out you WILL NOT want to go back. Once all that pressure is off you for a year you'll have no desire to put yourself back under it.

Basic survival tips. Budget and get used to eating Cup o noodles for awhile.

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Originally posted by amerlop
yes, the canadian thing intrigues me...how are the prices up there? How long do you think it would take to get residency? I bet apartments in the city are wicked expensive, right?

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Well, if you go as a student you only need to get a student visa. I almost went to uni in Ottawa, the only reason I didn't was a last minute snafu. Anyway, I literally applied for the student visa in the beginning of August before September classes started. It was a pretty simple procedure that the university will probably be able to advise you on if you decide to do it. Getting a regular work visa or work permit w/o going to university can be a bit of a beaurocratic nuisance. But basically it boils down to: if you can get a decent job, you can get a visa/permit.

As for prices.. I can tell you about Montréal.... it just happens to have the cheapest cost of living of any major North American city. It's absurdly and insanely cheap to live in Montréal. The rent is so cheap I can't even believe it. The funny thing is, the costs have gone up a bit in the past year because the economy and the housing market is booming, so people complain, but all I can do is laugh! Compared to the prices in New Jersey, and also where my friends live in other parts of the US (like Chicago and Dallas) it's nuts.. You can get a nice downtown 1 bedroom apartment for less than $500 us dollars a month. If you want to live outside of downtown or the trendiest neighbourhoods, it's even cheaper. The mass transit is great, so you won't need a car either, if you don't mind going without one (and car payments and insurance payments). Everything is really affordable. It's wonderful.

As for the cost of education, it really depends on the school. They are all different and some jack-up the prices a bit for international students which kinda sucks. But if you become a landed resident I think you can usually qualify for the cheaper "domestic rates". Also, since it usually takes less time to earn a degree, that means less money you need to spend...

Arjue: I have no idea what the costs are like in Australia, so I don't know if it's cheaper. Your best bet is to look up some universities online and compare the costs.

Sorry to hear that, amerlop. :( Your parents are being rude and unjust. They can take a flying fuck at a rolling doughnut.

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Originally posted by sggg
Well, if you go as a student you only need to get a student visa. I almost went to uni in Ottawa, the only reason I didn't was a last minute snafu. Anyway, I literally applied for the student visa in the beginning of August before September classes started. It was a pretty simple procedure that the university will probably be able to advise you on if you decide to do it. Getting a regular work visa or work permit w/o going to university can be a bit of a beaurocratic nuisance. But basically it boils down to: if you can get a decent job, you can get a visa/permit.

As for prices.. I can tell you about Montréal.... it just happens to have the cheapest cost of living of any major North American city. It's absurdly and insanely cheap to live in Montréal. The rent is so cheap I can't even believe it. The funny thing is, the costs have gone up a bit in the past year because the economy and the housing market is booming, so people complain, but all I can do is laugh! Compared to the prices in New Jersey, and also where my friends live in other parts of the US (like Chicago and Dallas) it's nuts.. You can get a nice downtown 1 bedroom apartment for less than $500 us dollars a month. If you want to live outside of downtown or the trendiest neighbourhoods, it's even cheaper. The mass transit is great, so you won't need a car either, if you don't mind going without one (and car payments and insurance payments). Everything is really affordable. It's wonderful.

As for the cost of education, it really depends on the school. They are all different and some jack-up the prices a bit for international students which kinda sucks. But if you become a landed resident I think you can usually qualify for the cheaper "domestic rates". Also, since it usually takes less time to earn a degree, that means less money you need to spend...

Arjue: I have no idea what the costs are like in Australia, so I don't know if it's cheaper. Your best bet is to look up some universities online and compare the costs.

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Thanks man, that info was very helpful.

Glad to be of service. :)

Thanks for all your advice and support, guys. It's appreciated. To update the situation, it looks like I won't be attending this semester since I need to save up money to relocate. My one saving grace is that the holiday retail season is coming up, so I should be clearing about half my yearly salary in a 2.5-3 month basis. The bad news is I might be sleeping in my car for a while so I may be a bit out of touch with the board. I'll have to find a public computer every once in a while to pay bills and such, so I will try not to go completely M.I.A.

But, I still love the board and I will try to keep up with the state of gaming in general as it is still, and will always be, one of my true loves

amerlop, I personally do now know how that feels and you're parents are real jerks, but I can relate a bit since my gf came from a disfunctional family where she had to sleep at other people's houses since her dad was a drunk and would beat her. At 16 the court of CA ruled that she's an adult and wouldn't be tied to her parents like minors. So she moved out and been on her own ever since. She's gone through some real rough times where she's been homeless and lives in her car. She been trying to go the school for the past 5 years but couldn't really afford it until she got finacial aid which really help get her back on her feet. Now she moved into her own place and got a new job. Hopefully she'll transfer to a university in a year after she finishes junior college and her pilot's license. After 3 1/2 years I've known her, now is the happiest time of her life. There were many times she wanted to give up and she thought her life would never get better. I just wanted you to know that when things are down there is still hope even for people who are in worse positions than you. Good luck man.

I'd tell them to go fuck themselves and make the most of yourself if only to throw it in their face.

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Originally posted by Freeter


Never had a job, going to college on financial aid, 3.0 average GPA, and my parents don't charge me rent.

Something's up with your folks.

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Work part time, go to college on finaid, 3.85 GPA, and my parents ask for every dime that I try to save.

I've wanted a car for 5 years now. One of these days... ^^

AFX has got it right. Make sure to put your folks in a really bad state-run nursing home someday.

I would try to stay in school, though. Take out as many loans as you can get - you sound like a really hard worker, and you'll be able to pay them off later, especially since interest rates are so low now.