Pretty cool story, I liked Gamefan online too, didn't know you were behind it... Are you going to tell us more?
PS. You should bone Jen
j/k, she is a friend for 10 yrs, she must be ugly!
I should shut my trap now.
Whoo-hoo. I think this is the end of these stories for me, as I seem to have reached my own tolerance level of me talking about myself (hah!). By request, here it is, redone and better than the lost Live Journal one, IMHO.
Set the way back machine to 1998. MVS was doing okay, and by okay, I mean pretty shitty. There I was, man with an AA degree and 1 year away from a Bachleors, and my 6.50 an hour job was working in the shipping department of a warehouse for a company that sold cheap knock-offs of Beanie Babies.
I drove the forklift. I lifted boxes. I loaded trailers full of boxes. I unloaded trailers full of boxes. Joy, I tell you.
I kept myself busy at night, working on reading and writing Japanese (for what reason, beyond personal curiousity, I don't know), playing some games, and then writing. I minored in Technical Writing at Cal Poly SLO, learning basics only, but I choose to write my autobiography for some reason.
In December of '98 (9 months into the warehouse job), I had a sizeable section of my story done. Needing critique and honest opinion, I passed it a very good friend of mine, Jennifer.
I was fairly worried about her reaction, she being a very upstanding and decent Catholic girl, yet my tale full of lewd, provacative and downright sordid sexual details, so, I wasn't sure what she would think.
I'd known her for about 10 years, and she was, and still is, the type of friend that will tell me what she thinks, not what I want to hear. Friends like that are not to be taken lightly.
She gave it back to me, and told me that I should become a writer. Fair enough, that was a very kind thing to say, but it wasn't any consideration of mine, and I begrudingly went back to work the next day.
By February, I hated that job more than I have ever hated any job. Again, I sought out Jen, this time asking advice on what I should do.
She told me to quit, and try to become a writer. She was genuinely worried that I would do nothing, as I had almost always done (preferring to let fate, destiny or whatever I called it make decisions for me) and wake up one day to be a 45 year old man, still working that shitty job.
That thought alone kept me awake for days and I knew what I had to do.
I went in the next day, talked to the manager, and put in my 2 weeks notice.
Now, at that time, I was living with a friend of mine, and had enough money for about 2 months of expenses, nothing more. Foolish of me to just up and quit perhaps, but that was the extent of my utter frustration. To me, it did not matter if I actually became a writer or not (there was 0 plan for that beyond thoughts), so long as I prevented my soul from a slow, meandering death by warehouse job.
In late April '99, I saw a story on GameFan Online. I liked the magazine, but I could only buy it in one store around me, and even then months would pass without an issue. If I saw it, I would buy it, but all I knew about it was that I liked it and someone had a picture that looked like a South Park Character in a UCLA sweatshirt.
The ad was simple, they were looking for someone to do news for the website, and the list of qualifications didn's seem too far removed from what I could do.
They were local, about 20 mins away from me.
They wanted someone to do it fulltime, which I was open to sans job.
Japanese knowledge, in some capacity was a big plus, which I had.
After reading those, I was determined to write the 2 reviews they asked for (one positive/one negative) and send it in the next day.
I stayed up all night writing those reviews (positive for R4 and negative for Macross Digital Mission VFX), and, by around 9 am that morning, I had them to a point where I felt that I simply could not make them any better. Spending anymore time on them would only cause me to think too much, and change them, for the worse.
I sent them in, and went home for some much needed rest.
Saying that I was surprised when I got a call from someone named Eric about 3 hours later (waking me up), is a massive understatement. He said he was the EIC of GF, and wanted to set up an interview. Amazed, I instantly agreed to go down the next day at noon to do it.
The interview was fairly simple, and walking into that place, was cool beyond words. Magazines everywhere, toys/trinkets and all manner of videogame materials were everywhere, making me think it was the polar oppisite of the warehouse.
Eric said that it went well, and that he would call me and set up a 2nd interview (and not to freak out if he didn't call me, because, in his words 'I will call'), and that was enough for me.
I went in the next week, did another interview with 2 new people and talked mainly about the Internet site and my thoughts on what I could do to make it better. I got a quick tour, loved what I saw, and would have taken the job on the spot if they had asked.
They didn't, however, and I was again sent on my way and told to expect a 3rd contact in 1-2 days. Happy as a pig in shit, I went home thinking of how cool it would be to get that job.
2 days passed...then 3...then 4, 5 and 6, and yet no contact was made. I was sure that was the ultimate sign, that I had gotten the 'don't call us, we'll call you' play and would now have to look for some type of job to work. Sucks, being that close and not getting it...
And now, we enter the highly personal portion of this tale. What follows is the typed journal I kept in 1998, shortly after the interviews took place. I considered simply telling what happened, but, I don't think that anything I can write on it will give a better feeling to what happened, than the actual Journal of the time. Better to post it all, and lay it all out there, than to hold back.
Tuesday, April 27th, 6:26 AM.
I do feel depressed about the job. Yesterday, Jimmy tried to cheer me up. He said “It seems like you said the interview went better on Friday, but today you don’t think it went well.”. I told him that I was more positive on Friday, but as time goes on and I don’t hear back, I do feel more negative. I really should just say, ‘well, if they don’t want me, on to better and brighter things.’, but I really want this job. Really wanting a job, and getting it are 2 different things, and I have a tough time differentiating between the 2. I felt better after talking to Jen yesterday, but honestly I don’t feel like talking about the job situation at all. It will either happen or it won’t.
10:05 PM
Still no word on the job, and I now doubt that I will hear. Friday must have been a mild kiss off, and not the definite contract proposal that I thought it to be. I really don’t want to write about that anymore, how many times can I analyze it?
Wednesday, April 28th, 1:49PM.
I just called Gamefan, after telling myself that it was better to know either way than to sit back and wait for some news. I called Eric, the man who had called to set up the 2nd interview, but he was out to lunch. I will call him back at 2:30, I am now just thinking about things to say. I don’t want to sound pushy, but I have to do what I have to do.
I proofread 2 more stories last night, so I think that I will correct the mistakes as I wait. More later.
2:43PM
On hold with Gamefan, waiting for a response. This is what was said:
Operator: “Shino media.”
Me: “Hi, can I have extension 404 please.” <the phone connects to that extension.>
Eric: “Gamefan”
Me: “Hi, my name is Matt, I believe I interviewed with you last week.
I haven’t heard anything from you guys in a while, so I just wanted to touch base and see if a decision had been made either way.
Eric: “Sure, hold on just a moment”
on hold for a minute
Eric: “Matt
Me: “Yeah
Eric: “You should be receiving a contract by e-mail shortly, so check it soon.
Me: “Wow, great. Thanks for the information.”
Needless to say, I was very happy to hear that good news. I checked the e-mail right away, but there wasn’t a new message. I called Jen and Mike, and they were both happy too, but I told them that until I hold that piece of paper in my hand, I won’t believe it. I feel better about knowing the news, but skeptic that I am, I have to see it to believe it. And some people wonder why I don’t believe in god.
3:07PM
Still no e-mail, but I keep checking it incessantly. I feel like a monkey with that cocaine bar, pressing thousands of times just to get that one hit. Nervous, Nervous, very Nervous.
3:57 PM
Dear Mr. Matt Van Stone,
Thanks for taking the time out of your busy schedule to meet with us the other day. We are pleased that you have expressed interest in joining GameFan and look forward to your addition to our humble family.
Position
News Editor - GameFan Online
Key Responsibilities
Preparing and updating the web site with daily news stories, both foreign and domestic. Contribute reviews and previews as time allows. Aid staff in general direction of GFO.
Compensation
$30,000 annual salary
Benefits
You will be eligible for Shinno Media health benefits on June 1, 1999 (providing you start on or before May 1, 1999). Benefits include medical, dental, & vision coverage.
Start Date
May 1, 1999
If you have any questions/concerns, please feel free to call me (818)676-1560 x417.
Best regards,
Jody Seltzer
Shinno Media
It came, it finally fucking came! Fucking hell, I would probably have taken anything over 18K, but 30K?!?! To do my current dream job? Un-fucking-believeable! More later.
11:07 PM
So, how do I feel now? Not a tough question, really. I am happy, perhaps more than I have ever, or make that been in some time. I feel like I finally have something that I can call my own, some level of achievement. One of the things that I will get into in the writing is: how did I feel when I was accepted into CAL POLY? Answer: normal. I never felt that I deserved to get into that school, as I never academically earned admission. I got in only on a technicality, and much the same as the things that Jimmy has given me all through out my life, I did not feel that I would have got it if I was any other person. Everything was always given to me, and I am not going to say that it is a bad thing, or that I don’t like it, but what I got and what I earned were miles apart. This job though, has not been handed to me, and because of that, I see the first opportunity in my life that I feel pride in my achievement.
It’s no secret that I did not feel I would get the job, you can easily see that in the last week’s journal entries. I wanted it so badly, and saw so much potential within it, that I could only think of that job. Family and friends consoled me, telling me truthfully that there are other jobs out there, but I knew that this was the one that I really wanted.
So now I feel like I have achieved something, gotten my foot wedged into that door and have a great start. I try to keep it in perspective, this company is not going to just hand me the money, but I feel that there is nothing about this job that I can’t already do, or learn within a short time. It feels so good to be believed in, and I guess that’s something that I strongly feel for Jen. When I was working at the warehouse, Jen would say “You are better than that job. You can do other things, and the sooner you believe in yourself, quit that job and get out there, the sooner your life will change.”. I knew that she was right, but knowing and doing were so far apart for me. I quit that job 2 months ago, and that was honestly a better feeling on the last day than today. I felt so good knowing that I had made a decision, and that something was starting.
The point is this. I know that this job is me, acquired on my merits alone, but I still feel that I have to thank some people for believing in me. Like I said, Jen, she always told me that I could write, and I could be a writer. I questioned whether she was telling me what I needed to hear, but Jen is honest, and I knew that her belief in me was true. I once read the book “Invincible Warrior”, about Morihei Ueshiba, and he had said that he couldn’t have become the man that he was, without the support of his wife. I was always proud to say that I didn’t do that, but in reality, as I said, most of the things that I got were given to me. Jen’s belief was infectious, instilling confidence in me and helping me to where I am. Devin and Mike, along with Jen, have also had to listen to my ravings, which I must admit are annoying at times. I think that they know I am intelligent, and better than a warehouse job, and the support that they gave me was great. Good friends, and I fell so happy to say that I have cut out the negative ones, Caesar and Aimee, and found 3 people that are honest and good.
At any rate, I look forward to working for this company. Let’s face it, there was so little to judge me on. I only had one month writing experience on my resume, and the only thing that I lied (EDIT *yeah yeah...Boo-urns on me) about was the dates. So, with 2 interviews, 2 reviews on one resume I was told that I could have the job. Again, it feels so good to know that this company believes in me, and that they think there is great potential for things within me. I am surprised that I got the job, but I must elaborate on one thing that I wrote about last week. I talked to Jen, and she said that I sounded happy, but I never screamed out with joy, why? Well, I am reserved, that’s true. The real reason is that I feel different. I don’t feel like the same person that took that warehouse job, did all those bad things over the years. I must say that I don’t feel like I am better, or simply a better person for getting one job, but I feel new in some way. I don’t feel like the same fuckup that I always thought I was. Is it confidence, pride or happiness? I cannot say, I just know that I feel different and I like that feeling.
Pretty cool story, I liked Gamefan online too, didn't know you were behind it... Are you going to tell us more?
PS. You should bone Jen
I should shut my trap now.
Actually, she's very beautiful, and quite an amazing woman.
She's also very married, and not to me.
Missed my chance and now friends for life, but, in her case, I can live with that. She's cool, and I do need a female perspective on things.
She does pictures for weddings, if anyone needs them. http://www.bellarosaphoto.com
Nah, once this thread has run it's course, that's it for me on the subject.Originally posted by kingoffighters
Are you going to tell us more?
Peaceful music on your friend's site...
I really want to read more about Gamefan, and GF website. They are always interesting, even if the people involved aren't exactly happy people
In any case, how long did your position lasted at GF.com, if you don't mind my asking? I recall visiting the site often, but one day, poof, it was gone
Analyzing Data 100%
Mayhap you be looking for sailors?Originally posted by mattvanstone
I drove the forklift. I lifted boxes. I loaded trailers full of boxes. I unloaded trailers full of boxes. Joy, I tell you.
Oh come on, like you didn't see it coming!
Nice story anyway, you still write really well
Yes, I saw it coming, and, no, I was not looking for sailors.
Trust me, once word got out of that at GameFan, and ShenMue was released, I heard them all. ALL, I SAY!
Braaaaaaainssssss
Entertaining story there. Quite interesting.
kof: The story of what truly happened to GF would take pages to list in detail. E-commerce and bullshit was its downfall...and I'll leave it at that. If Matt, Jay, George, Kevin, Anthony or even Eric want to open up that tale to tell the entire community, they will.
Rise from your grave, asshole!
There is nothing like the exhiliration of finally landing that job you wanted. Til the real world hits you and it all goes to hell, anyway.. believe me, I know
Sounds like it was a fun place to work.
Casual Gamer
damn just to write about videogames and update a webpageCompensation
$30,000 annual salary
Benefits
You will be eligible for Shinno Media health benefits on June 1, 1999 (providing you start on or before May 1, 1999). Benefits include medical, dental, & vision coverage.
i want a job like that
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