GI Joe Movie

[Mr-K]

[Chux]

CLIP ART!

[Mr-K]

I thought the lines around the money really added to the point I was trying to make.

[Fe 26]

THE MAJESTY OF THE MONEY!

[Destro777]

BTW, I love how all the fanboys (myself included) started jizzing when it was announced that Larry Hama was a creative consultant for this shitbomb. Unless the final product was destined to be even more off-base then this, he seems to have done fuck-all to please the fans. Hama can go suck a dick.

Eh, as soon as they announced the director, the movie was doomed period. Hama wasnt saving that. You want the real NEW more adult GI JOE? Go read the Hama penned GI JOE origins and forget the movie ever happened. Pick up the cobra series too. This is where its at and its falling right under alot of older fans' noses. Its like they always say "even when we finally get want we want - we still dont buy it".

[Some Stupid Japanese Name]

I've been saying this for years.

Me too, and the fanboys feelings were quite hurt.

[Dolemite]

Seems there's possibly a lot of turmoil behind the scenes of G.I. Joe regarding how much it sucks. While the producer is denying all the claims, I can only pray they're true:

http://www.aintitcool.com/node/41376

About The Alleged Behind-The-Scenes Turmoil On GI JOE...

This isn't news. This is score-settling.

Late last night, I received a number of emails alerting me to an epic tear-down of Stephen Sommers's G.I. JOE, which had been posted to producer Don Murphy's message board. I read the missive, had a good laugh, and decided not to post anything about it because wading into that story is a no-win situation. This isn't just about a troubled Hollywood tentpole.

I still feel the same way, but since the story has spread all over the place, here are the highlights from the since-removed post:

1) G.I. JOE racked up lower test screening numbers than any film in recent Paramount history (this would include SERVING SARA and MARCI X).

2) Stephen Sommers has been fired.

3) Producer Lorenzo di Bonaventura has been told to stay the fuck away from the editing room.

4) Hasbro is panicked that the G.I. JOE brand has been ruined.

5) Lorenzo is a poopy-head.

This is where I'll hand you over to my pal George "El Guapo" Roush at Latino Review, who got di Bonaventura to go on the record and refute most of the claims made in the anonymous post. Here's an excerpt from his comments:

Well listen, we tested very well and I don’t compare [it to the test screening numbers for TRANSFORMERS] because they are different movies, but you know I think its really destructive for a director…It hurts a guy's career when people go around talking about that he was fired or he didn’t do a good job and truth is he did a really good job. People are going to enjoy the movie and the test audiences enjoyed the movie.

He did a very good job the movie tested well and it couldn’t be more false that the studio in anyway did anything negatively to Steve.

It's up to you whether you want to believe a crank who won't sign their grievance or a guy who's gone on the record to deny up-and-down that anything is wrong with G.I. JOE.

Of course, Bradley Cooper recently denied that he was in talks to play Face in THE A-TEAM, when, as Variety reported this week, he was in talks to play Face. You might also recall Tom Rothman's claim that the theatrical cut of WOLVERINE would run significantly longer than the leaked workprint.

I'm not saying you shouldn't trust di Bonaventura. Though I think there's some truth buried in that post from Don Murphy's message board (if only because I've been hearing different variations on that story for the last month or so), I've been told by two different, trustworthy, completely unbiased sources that Sommers is currently working on G.I. JOE. As for the bad buzz, that's just someone else's negative opinion for now - though you're free to draw your own conclusions from the footage that's already out there.

Do with all of this what you will.

[Advocate]

I read the Latino Review thing. I ewas about to post it when I saw you did the AICN one.

Point:

I believe both are on board, but now as consultants. Both I bet are told to make it look like nothing happened.

Here's why ...

So what really happened in the editing room?


Lorenzo: Nothing that doesn’t happen on every other movie, which is that you constantly work and work and work and you make it better and better. We had a delay on visual effects so we waited a long time to finish the movie but that’s the only thing. I don’t really know why that would be interpreting it negatively but I guess it was.

He does not deny the allegation (a fight and the movie execs canning them) and does not go into specifics.

[Dolemite]

Actually, in a way, I think this might be good in the long run. You see, I originally thought this movie was just going to plain ol' run-of-the-mill suck. Not epic suckage, just an average, shitty movie that would only make select fanboys on the 'net angry.

But the fact that this might just suck SOOOO bad that the studio may be freaking and doing an ultra-covert firing/cover-up and the fact that so many fans are so vocal about how much they hate the end-product gives me hope that perhaps the studio sees how big a GOOD Joe film could be and will consider doing a complete re-boot they way we want after this movie crashes and burns.

Well, I can hope, right?

[Advocate]

Actually, in a way, I think this might be good in the long run. You see, I originally thought this movie was just going to plain ol' run-of-the-mill suck. Not epic suckage, just an average, shitty movie that would only make select fanboys on the 'net angry.

But the fact that this might just suck SOOOO bad that the studio may be freaking and doing an ultra-covert firing/cover-up and the fact that so many fans are so vocal about how much they hate the end-product gives me hope that perhaps the studio sees how big a GOOD Joe film could be and will consider doing a complete re-boot they way we want after this movie crashes and burns.

Well, I can hope, right?

OR ...

I still say this is all a lie and the real movie is being made as we speak.

unless they are lying and the REAL GI Joe film is the one we all want.

Cause here's the full message on Don Murphy's board.

So the story goes like this-

after a test screening wherein the film tested the lowest score ever from an audience in the history of Paramount, the executive who pushed for the movie Brad Weston had Stephen Sommers, the super hack director of the film fired. Removed. Locked out of the editing room.

Stuart Baird, a renowned "fixer" editor was brought it to try to see if it could be made releasable. Meanwhile producer Lorenzo whose turkey IMAGINE THAT explodes this weekend as the new bomb in theatres (also championed by Weston) was told his services were no longer needed on the film either.

Sommers was then forced by his William Morris agents to pretend that he was working on Tarzan over at Warner Brothers doing design work, even though that film doesn't even have a good script yet. When word of the firing started to be whispered about in Hollywood, Sommers was summoned back to the editing room- but only to save appearances, Baird is still editing the movie with studio input.

Hasbro CEO Brian Goldner, who turned down other offers from the property to go with the script that was rushed in 8 weeks by Stuart Beattie because of the writer's strike is frantic that this will destroy the brand and is distancing himself from the pending catastophe.

NONE of this needed to happen, except someone who did not know the mythology, Lorenzo was in charge of the film and never contradicted Sommers on anything. Lorenzo, so you know, was Chairman of Warners and had GI JOE under option there (not as a producer) for SEVEN years and he refused to greenlight the film, stating that because he gre up in Italy he had no knowledge of it. If you google enough, at one point you will see he wanted the film to be about an action hero named MANN (Action Man, get it) and he clearly had no clue what the GI Joe world really was.

And the hapless hack Sommers? Where did he come from? The confused Jon Fogelman at William Morris, who signed Hasbro away from CAA, had to find a director in a hurry for his new clients and gave him the only guy who he repped who would do it. A sad end to what COULD have been a great franchise. Acceleration suits indeed.