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Thread: Carnival in Rio

  1. Carnival in Rio

    My friend and I watched this video the other night, which was filmed back in 1983. It's kind of a documentary about Carnival, the huge yearly celebration in Rio, Brazil which is basically the equivalent of Mardi Gras here- but even crazier. Hosted by none other than Arnold Schwarzenegger, I assumed that he would just pop up here and there and offer a little bit of basic commentary. But I was wrong…this tape exceeded my wildest dreams.

    Actually, I'm SHOCKED that someone didn't track down this video when Arnold was running for Governor- it would have helped to substantiate the claims made by his rivals that he was a womanizer. I mean, politicians have guys working for them whose sole job it is to dig up shit like this. Eh, whatever. This video make us laugh our fucking asses off and that's all that matters. Watch and enjoy this comedy classic and wonder along with me how many of the women Arnold banged (probably all of them).


    The title screen…the breasts in the background seem totally appropiate.


    And here's Arnold! Cruising around Rio shirtless and in a dune buggy, he looks ready to explore the many pleasures the city offers.


    First, a delectable young thing keeps Arnold company while they watch some dancers. During this scene Arnold gets progressively more and more drunk. He also utters the immortal line, "I vas happy to see dat Brazil loved to celebrate my favorite body part…da ASS."


    Yes, Arnold was enjoying himself.


    Arnold was then invited up on the stage to dance with the ladies…


    …whom the mammoth sex machine molested the shit out of. Rock on, Austrian Oak. The look of orgasmic bliss on his face says it all.


    The next day, Arnold comes across a demonstration of the Brazilian martial art Capoeira. He stops to watch these two fight it out, Eddy Gordo-style.


    Clearly insane, this man throws a foot at the Governator of all people. Arnold simply laughs at the silly little man for thinking his pathetic kick could pierce his rock-hard pectoral muscles.


    Then this little girl tries her luck. Of course, Arnold rapes her savagely.


    Later, presumably after some hot, hot sex, another smoking babe helps Arnold suit up for the upcoming march in the parade.


    WTF


    The next day, Arnie heads to the beach to work out and check out some fine Brazilian ass.


    A comely young lass wanders by and admires his granite physique. He convinces her to try a few pullups, but alas, she's not strong enough to do them on her own!


    Thus, Arnold helps her the only way he knows how.


    He shows her some other exercises as well.


    They take a break to make fun of the attire of some homeless bum, then retreat back to the hotel for some brutal anal penetration.


    Now Arnold with yet ANOTHER woman (who looks a lot like Jessica Alba), watching another parade.


    Notice that Arnold flashes the universal sign for fellatio…which she then immediately returns! Arnold's getting sucked dry tonight.


    The next day, Arnold and his little knob gobbler have a romantic lunch together, where he asks her to teach him some of her language.


    Being entranced by the Oak’s mighty biceps, the overwhelmed woman teaches him words like ‘kiss’, ‘hug’, and ‘caress’…


    …all of which makes the 7-time Mr. Olympia very happy.


    But then Arnold, being the good will ambassador he is, wants to teach her some English in return! Hmm…not sure what having her felate a carrot stick is supposed to mean…


    …but she knows! After a presumably in-depth lesson, she shows her appreciation to Arnold by stroking his hair and singing him a lovely song…until she's overcome again and attacks him in a manner most salacious.


    More oral hijinks…


    Good bye! Maria, don't vatch dis tape!


    One of the most hilarious hours I've ever spent watching anything.
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    Last edited by Dolemite; 30 Sep 2005 at 05:04 PM.

    Dolemite, the Bad-Ass King of all Pimps and Hustlers
    Gymkata: I mean look at da lil playah woblin his way into our hearts in the sig awwwwwww

  2. That rocks like nothing else dole.
    "Your soul better belong to Jesus, mmm-mmmmm..... cause your ass belongs to me!"

  3. LAWL

    good stuff
    Commentaries and Opinions on Metal


  4. Dole, you've made my day. Thanks.
    R.I.P. Paragon Studios

  5. That's fantastic.

  6. Where can I get this?

  7. Quote Originally Posted by Chux
    Where can I get this?
    http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg...video&n=507846

    The price just jumped up. It cost about $30 a few weeks ago, and it's at $50 now.
    Last edited by Dolemite; 30 Sep 2005 at 06:55 PM.

    Dolemite, the Bad-Ass King of all Pimps and Hustlers
    Gymkata: I mean look at da lil playah woblin his way into our hearts in the sig awwwwwww

  8. Fuck that noise, where can I GET this.

  9. Dolemite has it. have him rip it and post it in (insert name here) torrent/DC++ network.

  10. Quote Originally Posted by Chux
    Fuck that noise, where can I GET this.
    PM me.

    Quote Originally Posted by Josh
    Dolemite has it. have him rip it and post it in (insert name here) torrent/DC++ network.

    Dolemite, the Bad-Ass King of all Pimps and Hustlers
    Gymkata: I mean look at da lil playah woblin his way into our hearts in the sig awwwwwww

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