Robobo - Now with more designs!

[jonas]

Something like that... Webcomics in general prove my idealistic standards towards my work (which I will never ever reach) are far too high. I just need to suck it up and do something, even if it's not the masterpiece I'd like, it'll undoubtedly still find an audience.

Exactly. If I like something. Odds are there are a million people out there that do aswell and at the same time there are probably equal amount who don't.

[MechDeus]

Can you be specific about the dialogue?

With the second there seems to be no flow with the characters, it comes off as stilted. First the robot complains about being seen naked, then wants to be scrubbed. "Embue" isn't a word and even if you had spelled "imbue" right it was still used wrong, as it should've been, "[...] I'm normally imbued with [...]." The punchline was terrible.

Perhaps less or no lead-up to scrubbing (have the kid washing his back and then start questioning) and something a little more implied with the final line. Maybe even take it past that and have the embarrassment hit in like the second panel and do a totally different end. Also, the rotating view of the room adds nothing and is kind of distracting.

With the third, I'd say get rid of the robot's dialogue entirely in the first two panels (or at least tone it down from violent reactions) and give the other two a more natural conversation. The kid talking the second panel appears to be a sarcastic response to the initial comment, but is just stupid instead. Why is he smirking in the third panel and she steaming?

Or maybe I'm way off. I started to do a little comic a while ago, didn't think they were very good, looked back on them later and found them terrible. Comedy's a pain in the ass to write well, the best I can do has aleady been done by someone else (Tomoyo42's Room) which is why I haven't bothered making anything to post online. I can definately say I didn't find your comics funny, though.

The woman in the comic? Her name is Grace.

Is she the mom? The wife of the robot? I'm guessing she's related from the comment of "Honey" but there doesn't seem to be any other indication. Is the robot acclimated to this world or not? He seems to act natural most of the time and then flipped out about witches. He goes back and forth from talking like an older stuffy man with overdone words to modern-style like everyone else.

The characters don't come off as characters, they seem to change roles based on the situation. Give each person a personality and then think from their perspective.

If people like Ctrl-Alt-Del they'd like ANYTHING.

Seriously. What the fuck is wrong with those people?

[Mman]

Lack of unique voice, perspective and any real understanding the neccesities of comedic timing as it applys to comics makes this a dire failure.

[Kaneda]

It's comics like this that remind me just how badass mine really are. I think Achewood is the only online comic that is of any quality, even after all these years.

My advice would be to read stacks and stacks of comics until the pacing and storytelling methods are fused into your brain.

[Drewbacca]

What's your comic?

[Salsashark]

Positive: I think it shows that you've been trying hard to improve your work. This stuff--the website, the delivery, the artwork--is all a lot better than I remember your previous stuff being. I did really think those comics were bad though.

The only punchline that worked for me like it was supposed to was in the first strip. Robobo's dialogue in the second panel of "Popcorn Piledriver" made me chuckle inside, but it seemed to detract from the other conversation going on throughout the rest of the strip, which had potential as a scenario but was wasted. I agree with a lot of what MechDeus said.

My advice, which I think you've already gathered, is that you should keep working on it if you want it to get better. It's good that you're taking others criticism to heart, not because I think you should compromise your work but because I think you're still missing a lot of fundamental things that most people will pick up on and tell you about if they're honest.

[Mzo]

What's your comic?

He had the one where MVS flies away.

That's the one that matters.

[FirstBlood]

He had the one where MVS flies away.

...And kicking soccerballs at people. Absolutely brilliant.

ps. Blue + puke-yellow is a terrible color scheme to run with in a comic that's supposed to be fun.

[Drewbacca]

Positive: I think it shows that you've been trying hard to improve your work. This stuff--the website, the delivery, the artwork--is all a lot better than I remember your previous stuff being. I did really think those comics were bad though.

The only punchline that worked for me like it was supposed to was in the first strip. Robobo's dialogue in the second panel of "Popcorn Piledriver" made me chuckle inside, but it seemed to detract from the other conversation going on throughout the rest of the strip, which had potential as a scenario but was wasted. I agree with a lot of what MechDeus said.

My advice, which I think you've already gathered, is that you should keep working on it if you want it to get better. It's good that you're taking others criticism to heart, not because I think you should compromise your work but because I think you're still missing a lot of fundamental things that most people will pick up on and tell you about if they're honest.

I take it seriously when people present their criticism seriously like Mzo and later on Mech Deus did once I asked him. This comic is a little young (only open 1 day) to really establish a pace and characterization of the characters, but with this advice and practice we will get better. We already have since the last time and right now that comic has gained over 300 page views.

Also, I think it's easy to make 5 good comics over the course of 3 months or 2 weeks. It's a lot more challenging to make a comic that's mildly entertaining to great consistently only a bi-weekly basis. One of the main reasons for me, personally, doing this is to get better at drawing. I have some natural talent but I never find time to practice. If I force myself to draw these things twice a week it makes me sit down and practice twice a week more than I do now.

It's only up from here. Thanks a lot for the advice.

[Bacon McShig]

Redesign Grace before you do anything else, she looks horrendous.