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Thread: Time Travel

  1. Sonic Time Travel

    Holy shit?!? .Hey guys! Zac and I just discovered fucking time travel! Now, I know what you're thinking, "Bullshit." But hear me out!! I have proof! We've done it and we've done it several times. It works. Now... now, we haven't worked out how to go to the past, exactly. But sure-fire, 100%, we can go


    And you can too!

    See, it all started six months ago when that tenderfoot, cock sucking, panty waste Nick banned me for half a year for some silly shit. Six months?? What in the fuck was I going to do for six whole months?? I mulled around for a few days and that's when it happened...

    On March 18th, Zac came over and like all great ideas, it started with a bottle of liquor. We were drinking beers, playing Legos SWII, and listening to me bitch. Two hours, one level, and eighteen beers later, he decided it was time to go home. I told him, "Wait!!" I had a bottle of homemade rum my pops gave me from a guy he knows who does these things! He said, "No way I'm drinking that basement booze!" I said "Fine." He left.

    I downed three shots, set down on the couch to get through the first episode... or fourth, whatever! While it loaded, I closed my eyes, for a tic... and when I opened them back up...

    The sun was out?!? What the fuck? Did the sun rise that quick? Had I been playing that long? No... no, I was still in Mos Eisley... I looked at the clock. IT WAS ONE O'CLOCK IN THE AFTERNOON, MAN!?! Where did the last ten hours go?? I checked Fox News... yeah, it was tomorrow. I had gone to


    I immediately called Zac to tell him the good news! He came over after work, and we tried it again. Three shots and a moment later, we closed our eyes for a tic... and when they opened? We had gone eight hours into


    It was un-freaking-believable! Zac didn't like it. He left sick, like fucking with the time continuum was wrecking his system. He was puking out his guts and couldn't think straight. But I didn't give a fuck! I'm young. I thought, "What do I have to lose?? This is for science, amigos!" So, I got a case of bottles from my pop's guy. Did it another 500 times. And here I am today, six month's in to the future!!!

    So, just get a bottle of 180 proof liquor, down one or four shots (depending on your tolerance), sit down some place safe (this is very important, don't do it at a trainstop or somewhere else public, trust me!!), and you instantly wake up six to fourteen hours

    So, what have I missed? How much is gas in the future? A movie ticket? What about Gobal Warming? Did they nine-eleven us again?

    XXX’s & OOO’s,


    I should prob get some rest now, time travel is pretty rough...
    "Question the world man... I know the meaning of everything right now... it's like I can touch god." - bbobb the ggreatt

  2. #2
    I have only done this once before. Your safety is not guaranteed.
    My Backloggery

  3. Welcome back, Doc.

    "To improve is to change; to be perfect is to change often." -- Winston Churchill

  4. Quote Originally Posted by Doc Holliday View Post
    What in the fuck was I going to do for six whole months??
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  5. Holy shit, it's been six months?

  6. tl;dr

  7. You really should r. It wasn't that l.

  8. "Alright, alright, think of it like this: jump ahead ten, twenty years, okay? And you're married. Only your marriage doesn't have that same energy that it used to have, you know? You start to blame your husband. You start to think of all those guys you met in your life and what might have happened if you'd picked up with one of them, right? Well I'm one of those guys, that's me! So think of this as time travel. From then to now to find out what you're missing out on. See, what this really could be is a gigantic favor to both you and your future husband to find out that you're not missing out on anything; I'm just as big a loser as he is, totally unmotivated, totally boring, and you made the right choice and you're really happy."

    -Jesse, Before Sunrise

  9. Finally Doc is back to class up this joint. I missed you doctor!


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