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Razor Ramon

Standing Still

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I'm tired of not going anywhere. I realized a few months ago I'm at a complete standstill in life. I've had little opportunity to move to anything else. With more seasoned pros competing for jobs suited for people my age, it's harder to find something to move to in my field. And it's aggravating.

I don't know how people can sit still in one place long enough and be content. It's impossible for me to remain happy in the same situation. At first I thought there was something wrong with me but then I noticed I just rule. I rule so much I can't stand in one spot too long or the ruling will destroy that place from existence.

Entropy rules.

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  1. Yoshi's Avatar
    You need a break a big story. Rich appears to be a disaster waiting to happen, so follow him around with a note pad, or whetever 21st century version of this is out there, and a camera.
  2. Josh's Avatar
    Quote Originally Posted by Yoshi
    You need a break a big story
    You need a talk like a Luigi.
  3. StriderKyo's Avatar
    Oh wait, you're still doing the newspaper thing? You're screwed. You need to develop a shrill political angle, like be the hispanic guy who hates illegal immigrants. Write all kinds of illogical rants - don't worry about facts, it just has to appeal to emotion. Also, you need a gimmick look. Like a special haircut that burns itself into people's brains but still say "media guy." Maybe some kind of gimmick string tie or 3 piece suits made out of denim.

    Then write a book to become a magnet for misdirected political outrage towards illegal immigrants, but do it with kind of a snotty sense of humour. They love that. You'll be on the best seller list and writing a syndicated column in no time. You'll have officially promoted yourself to pundit, you'll have an agent, and you might even get cast as a character on Fox News.

    I'm telling you, this is a huge niche waiting to be exploited - "guy who can talk trash about illegal immigrants and get away with it because he's hispanic so it's not racist." Make sure to talk about how hard your father worked and his loving, heavily Christian relationship with your mother who worked in an automotive plant 12 hours a day but still took the time to read the Bible to orphans during her time off. Also, how much they both deeply respected Reagan and raised you to be just like him.

    Damn, this is gold. Maybe I should convert to Mexican and use it myself.
  4. 's Avatar
    Like this?

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    or more like this?

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