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One night a bunch of buddies and I went to an Outback Steakhouse and the waiter was flirting hardcore with one of the taken women. Her guy was so mad about it that we stole every bottle of Yardley English Lavendar hand soap from both bathrooms.
Now, every time a group of us end up at an Outback, we take the soap. Good stuff, too.
When I was really young I shoplifted a G.I. Joe Snake Eyes action figure. This was right when they first came out, and my mom knew it. I had to lay out this bullshit story that I had found it.
I also lifted some kind of Hustler letters mag while staying at my grandparent's house one summer. I had no fucking idea what I was reading, but it was hot.
We just stole our porn mags from the Clement brothers dad, he had like 20,000 in his garage. Constant supply of porn confirmed.
man, yall really showed that one guy. he'll like, totally have to go to the back room and get more soap to wash his hands if he wants to use the public stall for some odd reason.Quote:
Originally Posted by Calliander
I take compressed air cans from the supply closet...my bedroom gets hella dusty and I'll be fucked if I'm gonna pay 4 dollars for a can of air.
Your friend is a complete pussy. I hope his girl fucked that waiter.Quote:
Originally Posted by Calliander
Protip: She did
I hope that waiter used Yardley English Lavendar hand soap to lube her asshole before plunging in.
My friend and I one day after high school were going to drop something off at this girls house. He missed her street, tried to take a sharp turn, spun out and hit a stop sign with his truck. We went and dropped the stuff off at her house and the way back up the street I made him stop so I could throw the stop sign in the back of his truck.
It was at that point I realized stop signs are a lot bigger than you realize when you're driving by.
I have trouble going to an amusement park and not leaving without a locker key. Is it still stealing if you have to pay some money to get to it in the first place?
I got a lot of cool stuff in my idiot teenage shoplifting days, but yeah, all it took was getting caught once to make me stop altogether. That was a terrible feeling at the time, but considering I hadn't even had a real run-in with the police yet back then, I didn't even know what terrible felt like. :p
Funniest thing that I ever stole (at least, that I can remember right now) would have to be the keys for one of the vans we used to go to athletic events in high school. In the early AM of senior prank day, a friend and I parked it sideways in front of the only entrance to the student parking lot.
We didn't try to break the key off in the ignition as originally planned, and the situation was resolved pretty quickly. :(