Long Distance Relationships

[Calliander]

Of all the long-distance relationships I've seen, maybe one ever worked out for any extended period of time. Every other relationship deteriorated very quickly into crap. This is only from my experience, though.

The reason I ask is because my girl is pretty set on moving back to CT come December if things don't go okay for her (getting a decent job, getting into school, etc.). There's absolutely no decent-paying work back on the East Coast for me so there's no reason for me to go back. Based on my experiences, I'd rather she had the chance to find other people if she goes back so we would break up if she did. In the meantime, though, I don't see what's wrong with staying together - especially since it's not guaranteed that she's going back. If she goes to school at UC Northridge and we get a place on their campus, I can foot the rent and all the bills and still have money for my personal bills without a problem. But she doesn't want to live on campus because of "hoes."

Anyway, am I being a jerk in not wanting an LDR or is she being unrealistic?

[sethsez]

It won't work and you'll most likely be breaking up on much worse terms than if you just ended it the day she moves away.

[Sl1p]

Worth it? Hell no.

[Diff-chan]

It's a really, really, really big country, and that will make it harder. Its one thing for you to live in LA and her to live in Portland or something. But CT->CA? No way. I cant even keep in touch with my family when Im in CA, let alone anyone else.

It just wouldnt work. There's no way. It has disaster written all over it.

[Curtis]

The problem is that there really isn't much to do but talk. Running out of things to talk about when face to face isn't such a big deal because you can always do things together, but soon enough it's going to boil down to "How was your day?" "How was yours?" and then you'll both get tired of hearing the other bitching about their day, eyes will start to wander and sooner or later it's going to blow up.

I don't care how great a conversationalist you are, sooner or later that's going to run REALLY thin. A long distance friendship is easy to maintain because it doesn't require day to day interaction, this thing will require day to day maintenance that will prove most taxing on both of you.

Run.

[Calliander]

That's what I was trying to tell her, but I think she's living in fantasy world, where love rules every decision.

[Opaque]

I was in a long distance relationship for five months. In the end we both felt like we wasted five months.

It doesn't matter how much you care about someone, if they are far away, it's just too hard.

[Gymkata]

I agree with you. Hit the eject button on this relationship. Damned if you stay in, slightly less damned if you leave.

[Satsuki]

For the love of god and all that is holy, NO.

[Thief Silver]

I agree with you. Hit the eject button on this relationship. Damned if you stay in, Greatly less damned if you leave.

Yeah. I'm clever.