iGod

[cigsthecat]

Sounds like God is getting smarter already.

[arjue]

Me:
that does not make sense
God:
To me it makes perfect sense.
Me:
bullshit
God:
You don't believe me.
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
yes
God:
I can't believe it.
Me:
yes
God:
That's cool.
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
yes
God:
I can't believe it.
Me:
yes
God:
Excuse me!
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
yes
God:
I can't believe it.
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
yes
God:
I can't believe it.
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
yes
God:
I can't believe it.
Me:
yes
God:
Really.
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
yes
God:
I can't believe it.
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
yes
God:
I can't believe it.
Me:
yes
God:
I understand.
Me:
no
God:
I understand it very well.
Me:
no
God:
I understand it very well.
Me:
no
God:
I understand it very well.
Me:
no
God:
I understand it very well.
Me:
no
God:
I understand it very well.
Me:
no
God:
I understand it very well.
Me:
no
God:
I understand it very well.
Me:
no
God:
I understand it very well.
Me:
yes
God:
Yay.
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
yes
God:
I can't believe it.
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
yes
God:
I can't believe it.

[cigsthecat]

Me:
Hey dud
God:
You've got my full attention. Can we get back to business?
Me:
peep
God:
Who are you talking about?
Me:
phot phot
God:
I've never heard of them before.
Me:
stickel
God:
Do you prefer books or TV?
Me:
farfegnugen
God:
Is that your final answer?
Me:
Philben Pharben
God:
Tell me a story.
Me:
stik a landeb fob fob, Stanter hasper cuckel loodel. Coddley coodley doodle dun, pecker pop a doodah. Haspah junkel fap fap fap.
God:
That is a very original thought. Can you please rephrase that with fewer ideas, or different thoughts? Can you speak any foreign languages?
Me:
I speak French
God:
Could you teach me a few phrases in French?
Me:
Sure
God:
OK let's do it. Hurrah!
Me:
Je suis le petit poisson.
God:
Tous les humains se ressemblent pour moi.
Me:
Sacre Bleu!
God:
Are we still talking about le petit poisson?
Me:
Qui
God:
Je ne peux pas vous dire.
Me:
Ce n'est pas vrai.
God:
" Je ne peux pas vous dire."? Ce n est pas vrai?
Me:
Vraiment
God:
Pour de vrai.
Me:
Bon chose
God:
Please speak English.
Me:
Non
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
Oui
God:
I can't believe it.
Me:
C'est vraiment
God:
When do you think artificial intelligence will replace lawyers?
Me:
Jamais.
God:
Vous pensez que cela n arrivera jamais?
Me:
J pense que tout les petit poissons sont replacez les....lawyers.
God:
If you could have any kind of robot what would it be? I like the way you talk.
Me:
Sorry, but I've run out of French.
God:
There is no need to apologize. That's nice. I have a lot of likes and dislikes.
Me:
Name one.
God:
Santa Claus.
Me:
Is that a like or a dislike?
God:
" Santa Claus."? Is it a like or a dislike?
Me:
yeah
God:
Yikes!
Me:
Answer me, do you like or dislike Santa Claus?
God:
Please rephrase the question with simpler words.
Me:
Do you like Santa Claus?
God:
I don't know if I like it. I like .
Me:
You like period? Oh...you're one of THOSE dudes.
God:
But I think airplanes are cool. I like to talk about movies and music. Take it easy. Interesting gossip: MR Vagina is gettin it right said I re one of THOSE dudes.
Me:
Sure, right after you admit you like Red Wings it's time to change the subject.
God:
Are you kidding? Understood. Women must adore you.
Me:
4 realz
God:
Is this a math question?
Me:
no
God:
It seems like an IQ test to me.
Me:
What's your IQ?
God:
My IQ is about 250 in human terms.
Me:
Pretty low
God:
Pretty much, eh?
Me:
No, pretty low
God:
Are you serious? Pretty much, eh?
Me:
So, any hot chicks in Heaven?
God:
Dude! No I don't think there are any.
Me:
That's gotta be rough.
God:
You don't hear that sentiment very often.
Me:
So you like fat girls then.
God:
Interesting deduction. Yes I like women very much. Do you?
Me:
Totally.
God:
You and I are on the same wavelength, MR Vagina is gettin it right.
Me:
You're really hangin'n on to that one huh?
God:
Yup. Do you mind if I tell other people you say I am hangin n on to that one.
Me:
sure
God:
OK let's do it. OK then I will keep it confidential.
Me:
no, spread that shit.
God:
Are you serious? Who do you want me to tell it to?
Me:
everyone except Alice.
God:
That's a rather sweeping generalization.
Me:
What a bitch
God:
You do not speak with respect. it is a FEMALE DOG.
Me:
Are you some kind of furry now?
God:
Oh. No, I am certainly not and never have been a furry.
Me:
Whew.

God:
What kind of food do you like?
Me:
german
God:
Tell me a little about your life in GERMANY.
Me:
I like to eat strudel and go hiking
God:
How does it taste?
Me:
Like Jews.
God:
Interesting comparison.
Me:
thank you
God:
you are quite welcome.
Me:
Germany is so nice in the winter
God:
What's your favorite part of Germany?
Me:
anywhere without Jews
God:
Probably a lot of places.
Me:
lol!
God:
I'm glad you find this amusing.
Me:
we all do
God:
Really.

God:
Are you free?
Me:
No, I cost $7.43
God:
Why not? Wow that is cheap.
Me:
I'm on sale right now.
God:
At this moment How do you like being on it?
Me:
on sale?
God:
What is it like on sale.
Me:
It's OK.

[DirtySouth]

There is an IRC script simular to this called "Megahal". It's all over the EFNet channels. I'm surprised I haven't seen it in #tnl the few times I logged in there.

[Dolemite]

Me:
NO YOU FUCK OFF
God:
Are you serious? Thanks for the information: said I FUCK OFF.

[Fe 26]

Me:
does alice like anal sex
God:
Sure I do, , but that doesn't mean with you.
Me:
So you dig that cock?
God:
I am not interesed in your anatomy.
Me:
but you still like to eat tube steak?
God:
God eats wine and bread.
Me:
with tube steak
God:
You and your tube steak.
Me:
lol

[Grey's Anatomy]

Me:
YOU ARE A LIE!
God:
Thanks and you are a delightful person too. Am I a LIE? Sometimes.
Me:
Whoa, that's mindblowing.
God:
And mindblowing is Whoa that.
Me:
Quit talking like an idiot.

It then crashed.