Idiotic Movie Reviews

[Despair]

Well, Here is a couple of lovely reviews for Ballistic.

http://www.reelinsider.com/ballistic.html

WTF is he talking about. Great writing style and understanding.

http://www.joblo.com/ballistic.htm

Another great sample of "proffessionally" written review issed:

Speaking of proffesionals, even Ebert been lately on the crappy sight. Who cant forget his infamous RE review with comeplaint about zombies beign SLOW and STUPID. Kinda like movie critics. So maybe he saw himself in them?

[Korian]

Ouch those Reviews are harsh. I'm gonna check out Ballistic this afternoon, I'm not expecting a deep story just lot's of gun play and explosions. Yep a Popcorn Movie.

[Despair]

Even if the movie ends up bad, those reviews are written so badly, they dont deserved to be seen. It just authors have no style, or no how to write coherent review whats so ever.

[ssbomberman]

Originally posted by Despair
Even if the movie ends up bad, those reviews are written so badly, they dont deserved to be seen. It just authors have no style, or no how to write coherent review whats so ever.

Yeah, I here ya. I'm a professional writer myself and I would kill to be a full-time movie reviewer and then I see writing like this and wonder, what the hell is going on? I read reviews of the the film in a couple of papers (they were all bad), but none of them talked about the film in detail--sure it's an action film, but how is the action? Camerawork? Why is the plot so bad? etc... It's a shame these guys call themselves writers, yet they never give us any real details about a film...what the hell do I care if they give it 2 thubs up? I want to know details... Also, almost every review made fun of the director because of his nickname Kaos....weak!

[Despair]

Good points there. They always point out story shortcomings, but who cares how the action was shot. Most of the critics are not action fans in the first place, so you just learn to not expect them to enjoy action movies in the first place. Unless it comes from some famous director, like Spielberg, and has some overwirtten and too dramatic story aka Minority Report.

ANd yes, Just making fun of the Director name/nick is not cool. SO what if he wants to call hiself Kaos. Also picking on him for mentioning that he likes directors like Michael Bay(who gets bashed alot too) is also weak.

[Zenigata]

Speaking of silly critics, how about that Richard Roeper? When they reviewed Metropolis, he claimed it was "weird," "freaky," and that it (anime) "just wasn't his thing," and that anime is something "only fans can enjoy." Now, last weekend, he's gushing over Spirited Away. He should make up his damn mind. He should have gushed over both of them.

Oh, and check this out, from ANN:

"Someone else who did not like Spirited Away is Michael Elliot of christiancritic.com. Christian religious reviews have long had issues with Anime as it generally presents beliefs different from their own and Elliot makes no secret about this, "Confession time. I'm not a big fan of Japanese animation. I'm also not very appreciative of films whose messages contradict the Bible from which I derive my beliefs. These are two big strikes against Hayao Miyazaki's Spirited Away." Despite this, Elliot continues with, "The fact that despite this, I've given the film two and one half stars speaks volumes as to its artistic level. Did I like it? Not really. Can I recognize the artful craft of its maker? Yes... for it is undeniable"


Baka. Hayao Miyazaki is probably one of the most spiritual people alive. I can't believe he's using these issues against something of great beauty like Spirited Away. Blah, the quote just makes me angry.